DoS jokes
Kid 1: I like you! Do you like me?
Kid 2: No. You never asked if I love you!
Kid 1: Aw, do you love me?
Kid 2: No!
If a fly loses its wings, is it now a walk? Wait a minute, I found out a mind blower. So the 🌎 is the 3rd planet from the sun, doesn't that mean all countries are called the 3rd country of 🌎? If I get 10 likes, I'll do one mind-blowing fact daily.
Why do people never kick their own balls?
Because they might lose one!
What do you call a male prostitute in a bar...
Handy Andy.
Her: "Land of the free".
Me: *fat*
Her: What do you mean?
Me: It's not fat-free.
What do you call an autistic kid with orange hair?
A boomerang.
What do you call it when you baptize a Mexican? Bean dip!
What do you call a priest that likes juice?
A Capriest Sun.
What do you do if your dick is smoking?
Get your mum to lick it.
Why do Emos always wear black like ninjas?
Because they're always cutting.
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it!
Why do orphans like boomerangs?
Because they actually come back.
What do you call a transgender person? Nintendo Switch.
So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.
When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"
He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."
What do you call a Deranged Psychotic Woman with a Stupid Hairdo?
Answer: Keri Lake!
What do you call a Chinese person with 1 leg? Tie Son Whu.
How do you give a woman from Alabama a nice compliment?
Answer: You say to her, "Hey, nice tooth!"
What do you call a virgin from Alabama?
I miss the good old days when you could have a light joke at someone else's expense. Like doing that marital rape thing, it never used to be called that. It used to be called "serving your husband" or "wifely duties". The real joke is that it was legal until 1990.
Why is that a joke?
Because it is piss funny seeing the look on her face when she wakes up in the middle of coitus.
Why is that a joke?
Dude, come on, you want to start your day off happy or not?
Why is that a joke?
She literally looks like she just seen a ghost and sort of flops about trying to fend you off like a rag doll. It's piss funny.
No seriously, dude, why is that a joke? It sounds more like a felony.
What do you call a blind and illiterate military leader?
Winston Churchill.