The clock struck one!
Then down did come!
Hickory dickory doc
What am I?
Random- a mouse?
Me- no dumb shit!
Random- what is it?
Me- the guillotine!
I needed a test on if I'm pregnant. Then the doc said, "Take your pants down." Then he put his penis in my vagina and said, "Now you are pregnant."
A woman in labor suddenly shouted, "Shouldn't! Wouldn't! Couldn't! Didn't! Can't!"
"Don't worry," said the doc. "Those are just contractions."
What did the doc say to the skeleton you skele-a-ton
A guy is at home and he's about to go get a physical at the doctor's office. When he gets there, the doctor says, "Brian, you're going to have to stop masturbating." He asked the doc why? The doc said, "So I can examine you!"