How did Donald Trump win Alabama twice?
By declaring that he has a crush on his daughter!
Why wasn't Michael Jackson admitted to college? He refused to declare a major; he only wanted to do minors.
How many Microsoft programmers does it take to change a light bulb? - None, they declare darkness to be the new standard.
When the school shooter kills the teacher and the autistic kid declares communism
Signs my cousin is going places when he's older: TEST QUESTION: where was the declaration of independence signed? He wrote: at the bottom of the page. Smart kid
One day, inexplicably, my talking parrot started insulting me. He called me an idiot, a fool, a jerk, stupid, and a variety of other nasty names. I warned the squawker to cease, but to no avian avail. Fed up, I finally flipped the foul-mouthed feather-brain into the freezer...but after about 15 seconds, I relented and let him out. "I'm so sorry," he declared! "I don't know what came over me, and realize I shouldn't have said those terrible things. I hope you can forgive me, and I promise never to do it again! By the way...what did the chicken do?" 🐔😂
9/10/01
Bush: “Ok i e got this just act surprised and pretend to be sad and declare war on Afghanistan”
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
What's up guys! Quandale Dingle here (RUUEHEHEHEHEHEEHE) I have been arrested for multiple crimes (AHHHHHHHHHHHHH) including: Battery on a police officer (WHAT), Grand theft, Declaring war on Italy, and public indecency (RUHEHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE x2 speed). I will be escaping prison on, MARCH 28TH! After that I will take over the worl
Why did Zayn Malik get his girlfriend to convert to Islam? So she can declare giGIHADid
I DECLARE WAR ON GWEN 📍🖌✒️🖋✏️🔏📝🔓
