What would be a pet's favorite thing to click on on this website?
Cat-egories.
Get it?
Why do cats like to sleep on the floor?
'Cause it's a car-PET.
What did a cat say to the dog?
"I will kill and eat you hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehhehehehehehehehehehehheehehhehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehheeehehehehehehehe"
What do you get when you mix a lemon and a cat?
A sourpuss.
Q: If cats have cat babies, dogs have dog babies, and tigers have tiger babies, what do fish have?
A: Eggs.
What do gay people and mice have in common?
They both hate pussy cats!
What animal has more lives than a cat?
A frog. It croaks every night.
I like cats
FICTIONAL BOOKS / AUTHORS
Outdoor Entertaining by Patty O.
Over the Mountaintop by Hugo First.
Plumbing for Idiots by Duane Pipes.
Music Theory by Amanda Lynn Player.
Meterology 101 By Wendy Reign and Sonny Daze.
Oh God By Dixie Rect.
Please Don't Stop By Craven Moorehead.
Life And Times Of A Porn Star By Dixie Normous.
Right Stuff By Dang Lin-Wang.
How To Take Care of Your Cat By Connie Lingus.
Right Way 2 Orgasm By Buster Cherry.
The Unwanted Child By Brooke N Rubbers.
Times have been so tough lately, I have had to jerk off the dog just to feed the cat.
In a proud, boastful voice, Gemma told the old Chinese woman who was babysitting her that onions were the only food that could make you cry. The woman nodded and said that was true enough.
They continued eating for a while. "This is really good!" the little girl exclaimed. "What's this meat?"
The old lady replied with: "Well, there was a brown dog in your yard that wouldn't stop yapping."
I came home from school one day and told my cat a kid at school said I was an idiot and told me to go kick rocks, so I did, except I kicked him, not the rocks, and I called him the idiot for not moving out of the way.
Mufasa is proof that cats don't always land on their feet.
I saw a cat. It said, "Raisin" when he saw a nut. Hahaha, I am a crappy joker. Put me in the nerd club.
While I was walking on the road, a cat crossed my road, and 5 min later I found it fell in the gutter.
Why aren't there any stray cats in Chinatown?
There are, but they're just listed as "pork" on the menus.
Kat, what? I did. A cat jump over the road because he believes he came flying in the clouds. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah! So funniest kitten kitten kitten kidding is my last time of Do you Joooooooooooooooooooooookin?
When a cat gets a sibling, do they say, "Oh, shit! Another mew kid?!?!?!"
Why are cats good at video games?
Because they have nine lives!
My cat is red and brown and her bones are crunchy, so does that mean she is a Kit Kat?
