Carrot

Carrot jokes

Pear

  • I will tell you a story. There was a fruit named Pear who was named Dyck. He one day met his friend Carrot, who was later killed after being stuck into some girl's vagina.

    Pear then became very sadistic and no one loved him, and he became mentally fruit-pressed. One day he met a Banana named Harvey Weinstein, and they got married and had children who were all named Minion. Eventually, the rest of his family died, and Pear was left slowly rotting away. His last words were, "I have finally 'peared' the consequences of all my actions."

  • 0
  • Girlfriend

  • So I caught my girlfriend masturbating with a carrot. My first reaction was "Shit, I was gonna eat that later, but now it’s gonna taste like carrots!"

  • 6
  • Community talk

  • so I'm a 1ft 2 inch carrot that is 4 inches wide. I was the biggest baddest carrot in the supermarket until one day, a 17 year old boy grabbed me alongside some vaseline. And then, when we got home, he dipped me in that vaseline and... I don't need to say the rest. Anyways I now smell like shit and his mother threw me out the window out of fear. I then got picked up by a trash collecter and he used me as a dildo too.… Read more