Cardiac Arrest jokes

Kids- it's time for Dora.

Kids- YAY!

Nick Jr. host- Today Dora is going on a big adventure with Grandma.

Swiper- Hello kids, I am trying to find my way to Diego's. Will you please help me?

Kids- Where's Dora?

Swiper- She's under cardiac arrest.

Kids- Poor Dora.

Everybody- SWIPER NO SWIPING!

Swiper - AH MAN!!

Yo momma so stupid, when someone got cardiac arrest, she tried to put the person to court, and when the judge said "ORDER AT THE COURT," she thought it's a food court and ordered 20 Big Macs and got a heart attack.

I got a heart pain then I went to [the] hospital. When the doctor says I am dead, but I run then I jump. I am not dead!

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.

There is a thin line between death and life!

You won't live to see it.....

The Cardiogram will!!

If you execute someone in ventricular fibrillation in the electric chair, will they come back to life once and then die?

Having survived a severe injury in my past, I'm kind of glad paramedics didn't succeed in bringing the United Healthcare CEO back.

I was suffering so bad I got delirious and thought that the nurses were putting poison in my water cup.

That CEO was so hated that one of the nurses probably WOULD have slipped him something!