Cant jokes

They call me Mr. Distracted, truly a spastic. Can't talk to my folks cause they say I'm pro- problematic. Really fantastic. Can't focus unless I take meds then it's magic. My brain is like traffic, always fucking active. But never at the right time, pretty fucking tragic it happens.

Hey you, the person who's scrolling, I know you might have depression and some feel they can't talk to anyone about it, so in the comments please, if you need to talk to others, if you comment about it and say you need to talk to someone, I promise you that I will talk to you. You are not alone, and even though it seems it won't change and get better, it will, I promise.

Please no harsh comments toward each other.

What did the bird say to the other bird?

Nothing, because birds can't talk.

Why do orphans not play baseball?

'Cause they can't find home.

Why can't orphans be gay?

Because they won't find anybody to call "daddy."

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't find their home base.

Why can't an orphan be gay?

Because they have no one to call "daddy."

This is why orphans are dangerous with cardboard. They either start eating it or making it into a house and hallucinating that they have a family.

So I threw out the cardboard and said, "You have to stay in reality. Fantasies aren't real. You can't and will never get a home."

Next day, they make cardboard parents, so I threw that away and said, "Pay attention to reality; you will never get parents."

Next day, they start acting like parents and tell me what to do. Again, I said, "Snap to reality. You will never be a parent!" The orphan responded with, "Oh, really?! How so?" I just simply said, "You don't have a house and parents. You literally like eating cardboard, and then you make parents out of it. You like to eat old people!"

What type of cake can't orphans eat?

Home made.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't find home.

Yesterday I saw an orphan kid playing GTA and told him he can't get 5 stars because he ain't wanted.

Why can't orphans play on a computer?

'Cause they have no motherboard.

Why can't orphans have cookies?

They are home made.

Why can't orphans use a phone?

Because they don't have a home screen.

Why do kids like to pick on orphans?

Because they can't call their parents.

Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he can't get home.

Q: Why can't pilots play Jenga?

A: Because they will just hit the Twin Towers.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

'Cause they can't find home.

What do you call a German that can't see? A Notsee.

Why is an orphan crying about its family?

Because it can't "let it go."