What's the difference between a fish and a car?
You can tune a car... but you can't TUNA fish! x3
Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? At least it was a soft drink.
A good bath is like a dead lover.
You can enjoy them, that is until they get too cold.
Why did they invent glow-in-the-dark condoms? So gay guys can play Star Wars.
Any joke can be funny with the right delivery. Except abortion jokes, because there is no delivery.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A hooker can wash her crack and resell it.
What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just WAVED. Can you SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Why are you so SALTY? Don't be a BEACH.
How do you find a redneck virgin?
Just look for a 4-year-old. They can run faster than her brothers.
I can see your cameltoe, you nasty thot!
Student: Hey! Did you hear the joke about the three holes in the ground?
Teacher: No?
Student: All I can say about it is, "Well, well, well."
Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a soda can?
He was lucky it was a soft drink!
Jesus could walk on water, and Chuck Norris can swim through land.
Chuck Norris can make 5 minute frosting in 4 minutes.
How many gay guys can you fit on a bar stool? Four, just flip it over.
What’s the difference between bowling balls and babies?
You can unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.
What's the difference between a truck full of babies and a truck full of bowling balls?
You can only unload one of them with a pitch fork.
For 15 cents a day, you can feed an African child. They eat spare change, I guess.
"Can I tell you a paper joke?" I said, "But it is pretty terrible."
What do you call a Jedi that can use the force to fly?
A Jedi Flight.
Where can you find the freshest vegetables? A school for the disabled!
