Butcher jokes

Why did ze cow cross the road?

yo watch his mum getting butchered she was an udder failure.

I went on a date last night and told my date I worked with animals every day.

She said, "Oh, how sweet. What do you do?" I said, "I'm a butcher."

First Date: HE: "I work with animals every day!" SHE: "Oh how sweet! What is it that you do?" HE: "I’m a butcher." SHE: "Perfect! I work with humans, I just kill them by cutting them up!"

HE: "So it's you in the newspaper?" SHE: "Yes, it was, wanna be next?" HE: "No!"

I went to a butcher house with my little cousin and saw a baby pig and told her, "Look, it's Pepa Pig!"

She started crying.

I just found out my ex got stabbed today... let's just say I lost my job as a butcher.

Why did the man say chickens were lucky?

Because they get killed and eaten.