And jokes
Yo mama's so fat, it took me two buses and a train to get to her good side.
What is Osama bin Laden's favorite game?
Hide and seek.
How to kill a blind person.
Give them a gun and tell them it's a hairdryer.
What do a mole and an eagle have in common?
They live underground, except for the eagle. Lol.
Q: What's yellow and floats?
A: A bus full of children.
Did you hear about the new drink commemorating Princess Diana?
It had nine shots and seven chasers!
Why were the World Trade Center so mad? Because they ordered 3 pizzas, but 2 came in plane and 1 went to the wrong address.
If 2 + 2 is 4, and 4 + 4 is 8, then that must mean I can lick your pussy.
Arab rizz. Are you a tower? Because I wanna blow you up and don't let your friend know about this. Rashid, I told you not to blow it up, I had it.
The greatest Arab pilot, my grandfather.
*True story*
I saw this guy with a very bad hairline who was painting himself blue and it said "Smurf Paint," but I shouted, "Megamind!"
What’s the difference between an orphan and a baseball field? The baseball field has a home to run back to.
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
Yo mama so stupid, she put a battery up her a** and said, "I GOT THE POWER!"
Why should a feminist never be allowed to join the UAW United Auto Workers?
Because the only thing that a feminist will do in the UAW United Auto Workers, is eat pussy all day inside the women's restroom and she will only pay her membership dues, if she is allowed to eat pussy all day inside the women's restroom.
I bought my son a trampoline for his birthday, the ungrateful fucker just sat in his wheelchair and cried.
My girlfriend called me a "pedophile", and I said, "That's a big word for a 5-year-old."
POV: A person made you mad, but you're Chinese and they have a cat. "CHING CHONG, CHING CHONG, CHING CHONG, BITCH."
I snorted a line of coke off my 8-year-old sister’s tiny prepubescent vag. She just laid there and let me do it without complaining, probably because she was already dead.
Today was the worst day of my life. My ex got hit by a school bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.
A police officer came up to me and said, "Just why, why would you bring the epileptic children to a laser tag fight?"