And jokes
What is the difference between a lesbian and a female prostitute?
If you want a female prostitute to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.
What is the difference between a feminazi and a female prostitute?
If you want the female prostitute to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.
Stalin asked Hitler if he wants to hear a joke.
Hitler says, “Yes.”
Stalin then says, “Moscow.” Hitler replies with “I don’t get it?”
Stalin laughs for a long time and says, “And you never will.”
Your forehead and your hairline must be friends, because they go way back!
I went to the tattoo shop and asked for a skull.
A Jewish guy behind me said, "A skull? Back in my day, we could only get numbers!"
What’s the difference between a Catholic and a rabbit?
One has kids to protect from predators, and the other has kids for predators.
What's the difference between me and a rope?
A rope will hang with you.
Hondo's dad and mum went up the hill to do it in the water.
Jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a Hondo.
People should've recognized that Jared Fogle was a sick offender by one coded Subway sandwich; he normally claimed to kids he ate the sweet onion chicken teriyaki when it was the tuna sub.
Tuna sub was the message of the target to the kid since "tuna sub" put together makes "tunasub" and the truth comes when you spell it in reverse ("busanut")!
I make suicidal jokes because I am a suicidal joke. And now for my closing act at the end of the rope.
What’s the difference between someone’s wife and a plate?
They both have to stay in the kitchen.
Why did the towers fall? Because someone in Call of Duty hijacked the planes and crashed them into it.
What’s the difference between an ant and an orphan?
The ant knows where home is.
What does an orphan and Spider-Man have in common?
They have no "why home" 👹
What does Michael Jackson and Chef from South Park have in common?
They both say "Hello children!"
What's the difference between Vin Diesel and an orphan?
Vin Diesel has family.
Reverend Mother walks into the convent and announces:
"Sisters, our carrots have been delivered!"
Nuns exclaim: "Hurray! Carrots!"
Reverend Mother: "They are grated carrots, though."
Nuns: "Ugh! No, thank you then..."
What is the difference between an emo kid and a jug of milk?
The milk doesn't hang itself after it gets dumped.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Goliath.
Goliath who?
I need to Goliath down and sleep!
What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common? There used to be two of them, but now it's a sensitive subject.