I was having sex with my girl and she said she likes it rough so i socked her in the face.
Chuck Norris: "I block bullets with me beard". Abraham Lincoln: "I catch bullets with my skull"
This rat did the most amazing thing ever it was pretty radical dude.
What's long and can never wait for more for the ladies action and likes when it gets harder... Your Penis
Chuck Norris once ran all the way around the equator and kicked himself in the back
If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Chuck Norris once stepped on a Lego.
The Lego broke in half.
What's the difference between a feminist and a suicide vest?
At least one does something when it is triggered.
Chuck Norris can make 5 minute frosting in 4 minutes.
Chuck Norris doesn't turn on his shower, he just stares at it until it cries
Chuck does not cut butter with a knife, he cuts a knife with butter.
Chuck Norris doesn't zoom out everything moves backwards
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect 4 in only three moves.
If Chuck Norris was a Spartan in the Movie 300, the movie would be called 1.
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 20 people, then it exploded.
Chuck Norris was a kamikaze pilot. 12 times.
