We aren't ghosts, but I'll take you under the sheets.
incendiaryRat
@incendiaryrat
I don't know why tf I'm here I was bored so here I am.
Are you a keyboard, because I wanna tap you all night long.
They say I have a silver tongue, I'll let you make it white.
I'm not counting, but I have some fingers for you.
Roses are red, violets are blue. Get over here so I can fuck you.
The best part about Asian jokes is that the only people that can be offended can't see the jokes.
Why do orphans always go to white vans when someone asks?
Because they want to feel wanted.
I had to go to the doctor for a prostate exam. When he stuck it in, I started to squirm, so he held onto my shoulder.
I thought it was going well, until he grabbed my other shoulder as well.
What's the difference between a cop car and a hedgehog?
With a cop car, all the pricks are on the inside.
What do you call a group of cops having a sleep over?
Pigs in a blanket.