Worst Jokes Ever
I asked my wife if I could use toys during sex last night. You should've seen her face when I rolled my Hot Wheels across her tits.
What story does an orphan always get kicked out of? Home Depot.
What did the racist CoD player say to yo mama?
132.513.531.332
What's an orphan's favorite part in the Wizard of Oz?
When Dorothy says, "There's no place like home."
I wouldn't call a Suicide Help-line even if my life depended on it.
What do you call an epileptic kid eating fruits?
A blender.
Roses are red, Obama is well spoken, I'm sorry sir, but the ice cream machine is broken.
What do Michael Jackson and ACN have in common? They both go in little kids.
Kid: "Hey, are you an orphan?"
Friend: "Yeah, but you are too."
Kid: "At least my parents wanted me."
All these jokes are plane wrong. My uncle died in 9/11. At least he died doing what he loved, flying planes.
This is nothing to do with 9/11, but this is my best joke.
What do you call a Paki in a microwave?
Pting pting pting.
What is the difference between Madeleine McCann and a submarine?
They are both full of seamen and are at the bottom of the ocean.
Fancy playing rodeo sex?
"OK then," she said!
Then put your dick in her ass and say it’s not as tight as your sister’s ass and hold on for dear life... real life cow bow boy shit!
You know, people should really stop making fun of 911....both my parents died.
One driving one plane, and the other driving the other.
How do parents punish their blind kids?
They re-arrange the furniture.
Why did the orphan become a killer?
Because he knew they would not look for him.
Why can't disabled people make jokes?
Well, it's called Stand-Up comedy, isn't it?
A collection of 911 jokes.
What kinda pizza did they order at 911?
Plane.
What was the color of 911?
Plane.
What is the fastest way to see 911?
Plane.
Dark humor jokes about orphans are funny because no parents are gonna be told.
1.) What’s yellow and can’t swim?
- A bus full of children.
2.) Did you hear about the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
- He died of a yeast infection.
3.) I will never forget my grandad’s last words...
- “You’re still holding the ladder, right?”
4.) I have a fish that can breakdance...
- Only for 20 seconds though, and only once.
5.) Give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours...
- Light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.