Worst Jokes Ever
Why does the military pick orphans as fighter pilots?
Because homing missiles don't work on them.
What is it called when an orphan takes a selfie?
Family photo.
What’s a downy's favorite song? Down Under.
Dad's secretary left her position, he told me I could take it if I want it. He also told me the job pays well but there is a lot to catch up on. He kept me under the pump all week.
Why do people make fun of you jokes in worst jokes ever? Because it is called "worst jokes ever."
How do you bury a prostitute?
In a Y-shaped coffin.
People always ask what the secret of our family's happiness is. It is simple really.
1. Television and computer games are limited to a couple of hours each week.
2. We all give each other a hand when needed.
Last but not least, we play Twister.
Why is Death the world's biggest slut?
Death gets to f*** everyone.
My Dad pays a lot of attention to our household and has always had a good eye for detail. He was the one that first noticed that my mother and I have the same ring size.
Oh, brother!
What do you call a Muslim with Tourette’s? A ticcing time bomb.
What is the first thing you should always take care of first after a car crash?
The witnesses.
Yo mama so fat, when she bought a fur coat a whole species went extinct.
What does a piece of gum and a gun have in common?
You pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
What time is bedtime at Michael Jackson’s house?
When the big hand touches the little hand.
How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
Out of a catalogue. 😁
If a blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who would hit the ground first?
The brunette, because the blonde would have to stop and ask for directions!
What does a bungee jumper and a homosexual have in common?
When the rubber snaps, they both end up in the shit! 💩
Dear disabled people, just go to the settings and enable it!
What weighs 70 pounds and doesn't like sex?
The 6-year-old in the trunk of my car.