My proctologist used to be a photographer, he took x-rays and told me to bend over and say cheese
Tuesday I was looking at my family tree and two dogs were using it
When I have sex, my girlfriend screams, especially when I walk in on her
I met a fat chick at the beach. People started asking me what I use for bait. Or do you want us to help throw the Whale back in the water?
I ran into a fat woman today she said next time don’t hit me. I said I don’t think I have enough gas to go around. Then the ground start to rumble with every step she took
I complained to my dad why he never took me to the zoo. He said they want you they’ll come get you.
I just encountered a father and son moment over some milk The dad finally came back with the milk
This was a few months ago. I used to help people load and unload inventory, one day I’m driving home after having lunch with my sister, and she asked if we can stop at the next gas station,I told her so you can weigh yourself on the truck scale.
Last year, I gave my brother a BB gun for his birthday, he gave me a T-shirt with a bullseye on it. I asked him what was the bullseye for he said target practice
Some people are such "treasures" that you just want to bury them
I may not be your cup tea, but I am definitely your 10th shot if tequila
What do you call a group of Daveons? A 'daveon'-ation.
Why did Daveon decide to become a magician? Because he wanted to make his problems 'daveon' disappear.
What's Daveon's favorite type of music? Daveon-core.
How does Daveon like his coffee? Decaf-eon.
What did Daveon say when he saw a spider? 'I'm daveon with this!'
Why did Daveon get fired from his job at the orange juice factory? Because he couldn't concentrate.
How many Daveons does it take to change a lightbulb? None, he prefers to stay in the dark.
Why did Daveon go to the doctor? Because he was feeling 'daveon' in the dumps.
Eons it takes to dav on the haters
