Worst Jokes Ever

A black dude shows up to a job interview for a watermelon farmhand gig, resume full of fried chicken joint experience. The boss asks, "Why should I hire you?" He stutters, "Uh, I got skills in... uh..." Before he can finish, a hulk-like, veiny, muscular, giant transgender man storms in, straps him to the interview desk with velvet cuffs, drips hot wax on his back from a candle shaped like a massive dick, and rams his ass relentlessly while whispering, "Welcome to the team, bitch. Your probation starts now."

Codenames for them FUCKING drugs, my crackhead ngas.

Cannabis: Weed, Pot, Ganja, Herb, Grass, Mary Jane, Bud, Chronic, Kush, Trees, Hash, Hashish (concentrates).

Cocaine: Coke, Blow, Snow, Dust, Charlie, White girl, Pearl, Nose candy, Rail, Sniff.

Crack Cocaine: Rock, Hard, Nuggets, Dice, Jelly beans, Moon rocks, Sugar block.

Heroin: Smack, H, Dope, Junk, Black tar, Brown sugar, China white, Horse, Dragon, Skag.

Methamphetamine (Meth): Crank, Speed, Chalk, Ice, Crystal, Glass, Shards, Tina.

MDMA (Ecstasy/Molly): E, X, XTC, Molly, Beans, Adam, Happy pill, Love drug, Dancing shoes.

LSD: Acid, Tabs, Doses, Dots, Blotter, Window pane, Sugar cubes.

Ketamine: Special K, K, Vitamin K, Cat Valium, Green K.

What do you call a race car driver with Down syndrome? Down shift.

What do you call an under-the-weather seven?

A sick seven.

I called an Asian person and asked, 'Is this Mister Wing?' 'No.'

I called once more and asked, 'Is this Mister Wong?' 'No.'

I guess I 'winged the Wong number.'

When the priest said, "Be gone from this boy, demon!" the demon replied, "And you get out of the boy!"

Your hairline is so far back, a pilot thought it was an airplane.

How do terrorists feed their children?

Here comes the airplane.

Why did the cop show up early to the protest? To beat the crowd.

Your hairline is farther back than the Mexican border.

Your mama is so fat, the photo I took of her last Christmas is still printing.

So I was living with a girl for a few weeks, and it was nice until she found out that I was there.

Called a homeless kid 'Spider-Man' because he had no way home.

What did Rengoku say to his class?

"Set your school ablaze!"

My mom was 19 when she was pregnant with me, My mom was 39 when she was pregnant by me!!!

What do you say to a feminist with no arms and no legs?

"Nice tits, bitch."

How do terrorists feed their children?

"Here comes the aeroplane!"

"And here comes the second one!"

Kurt Cobain said he wished he was gay.

That's why he married Courtney Love.

I dated an Indian girl for about six months. She was always Sikhing attention.

What kind of bride does the pedo icon like? A "maik order" bride. Why? The male part.