Worst Jokes Ever

Q: How do you cover a Chinese's eyes?

A: Use dental floss.

America has white people that are terrorists and racists. They love to blame people from different countries for what they have done.

White person: "We are not terrorists. Why would [we] ever do that in our history?"

The rest of the people: *looks at them stupid* "Y'all were the first motherfuckers to be a terrorist first and then wanting to blame others for your action."

1 person: "You still carrying that confederate flag. It means hatred and [you're] still trying to fight to bring back slaves again. Y'all say it's heritage and not hate, but [you're] clearly still a fucking loser, and your flag has an X [on it, which] means wrong. So... Still a loser. People can't be racist to a racist. It just doesn't make sense. I'm not saying all white people are racist, but I am talking about the ones who voted for Trump and be blind as hell. FUCK DONALD TRUMP AND THE RACIST PEOPLE!"

I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage.

I lost the case.

You have a six-minute timer to live, but when you breathe, it resets.

What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?

Special Forces.

3 men walk up to Indians, one American, one Muslim, and one African American. The Indians say, "We're all gonna kill you." One of the men asks why. The Indian says, "So we can use your skin to make kyanks." He also says, "Y'all decide how you die." The Muslim says, "I want to drown," so they drown him. The African American says, "Shoot me." And the American grabs a fork and starts poking himself everywhere, I mean everywhere. The Indian said, "What's the point of this?" and the American says, "F**k your kyanks."

My brother's addicted to buying ladders; he loves to get high.

I would tell jokes about Kobe, but they would just crash and burn.

Michael doesn’t fart. Jackson does.

What category of music did JFK like?

You could say he was a metalhead.

Doctor: I diagnose you with obesity.

Patient: It runs in the family.

Doctor: Nothing can run in your family.

To everyone saying, "Don't joke about suicide, it's not even funny to laugh about people dying." Do you think we have it easy? Have you ever thought these jokes were helping us to cope? Mind your own business and don't make assumptions on people you know nothing about, please and thanks.

Have you heard of the current event in Africa? It’s called the Hunger Games.

Why was the ant so confused? Because all his uncles were ants.

Bf: What do you think about our love?

Gf: Count the stars in the sky.

Bf: Aww, it's infinity.

Gf: Nope, just a waste of time.

Atoms never touch, so it means, we haven't touched each other or anything. So, sir, I did not drop-kick that child.

Incest. A game the whole family can play.

Scrolled through all of them, still haven't laughed.

What do a bullet and a police officer have in common?

When a bullet kills someone, it gets fired.

Why did the dog go into the fire?

Because it wanted to be a hot dog!