Worst Jokes Ever
I bet for Halloween you were a Goblin. How about you gobble deez nuts?
What happened when the emo kid tried to high 5 a tree?
It left him hanging.
Why couldn't the emo kid hang himself?
After eating through his feelings, the belt wouldn't fit around his neck.
What do JFK’s killer and a prostitute have in common?
“They both blow heads.”
Why do orphans want to be communist?
So they would have a motherland.
An old man walks to a busy restaurant. He tells the waiter what he wants and asks her, "Can I have a discount? I served in the war."
The waitress says, "Of course, and would you like that meal with sauce?"
"Nein," said the old man.
What does a mother fear most?
Hearing "YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!" for 5 different men.
What is another name for a serial rapist? Short dress enthusiast.
If a crippled man told stories about himself, would that be called VeggieTales?
"In my opinion, JFK was the best president."
"Why?"
"He was very open-minded!"
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome trying to beat Minecraft?
“A sped runner.”
Q: What did Donald Trump say after America gave him the boot?
A: What am I supposed to do with one boot?
Twin Towers are like genders, there used to be 2.
What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange?
I don't keep a trash bag full of oranges in my basement.
What's the difference between an asshole and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What type of cookie has an orphan never had? Homemade cookies.
So I had a friend who was an orphan, and he said, "How's your girlfriend?" I said, "I don't have one." He said, "I know, just reminding you." I then said, "Hey, how's your parents?" I never saw him after that.
Your forehead [is] so big that if I drew an H on it, Kobe could have landed there.
Dark humor never gets old, like kids from Africa.
Jimmy Savile should have presented Pop off the Tops instead of Top of the Pops.