Worst Jokes Ever
What did one iceberg say to the other iceberg as the Titanic went by?
"I'd smash that."
You're so skinny that when you're driving, you have to put the seat forward to reach the pedals. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
A guy stole my car last night. Before dialing 911 I thought, "Fuck it. Let him explain the dead bodies in the trunk."
You know who else has dementia?
Comments for answer.
What do girls and noodles have in common?
They both wiggle when you eat them.
What is a reversed exorcism?
It's when it's the demon who's telling the priest to get out of the child's body.
What do you call a Chinese man in the heat?
Boi Ling.
Feminists think men hate them. MEN HATE FEMINIST KARENS. We already have equal rights. It wasn't always like that, but that was in the past. So, fuck feminists.
(Like if you hate feminists.)
I tried phone sex once. But the holes were too small.
Biden: See you later, alligator!
Alligator: In a while, pedophile.
I love you, Lovely Perv!
Why do midgets giggle when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
BF: Babe, I have two questions.
GF: Ok, ask!
BF: Where have you been all my life?
GF: Aww, that's so sweet. And the second question?
BF: Can you please go back there?
GF: What do you think of our love?
BF: Count the stars in the sky.
GF: Aww... It's infinity!
BF: Nope. It's just a waste of time.
There is one difference between autistic kids and vegetarians.
They're both vegetables in serotonin ways.
What did Michael Jackson say to the child sitting on him?
“Just beat it! Just beat it!”
Crispy, Juicy, Tender, I just put my new-born son in a blender.
I was in class doing sex education. We were learning about sexual stereotypes.
My teacher turns to the class and asks, "If anyone could tell him what a sexual stereotype was?"
So I raised my hand and said, "Asians have small penis." He looked at me and said, "Very good, but I was looking for a definition."
The best way to tell someone that you don't like them is by texting them "370HSSV 0773H" and tell them to read it upside down.
First date be like:
Me: "I work with animals every day."
Her: "Oh, how sweet! What is it exactly that you do with them?"
Me: "I'm a butcher."