Whos jokes
Knock knock. "Who's there?" "Grandma." "Oh, okay."
Nah, it's a penis.
Guess who I saw at school today?
Everyone I looked at. loooooooool
One day Nathan came in ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Nathan, what do you have to say for yourself?" Nathan says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then Dave came in a further ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Dave, what do you have to say for yourself?" Dave says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then Mike came in a further ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Mike, what do you have to say for yourself?" Mike says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then five minutes later a new girl walked in to Mr. Jones's lesson. Mr. Jones is at the end of his tether now and says, "Who are you and why are you late?" The new girl says, "Sir, I'm called Cherry Hill."
One day Little Johnny's class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?" Little Mary says, "The teacher is very intelligent." The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?" Little Suzie says, "They are very fashionable." The teacher says, "Johnny, why don't you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence." Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy 'Darling how does my dictate'"
Did you know that there is a new drug on the market for lesbians who are suffering from depression? It's called Trycoxagain.
A foreign man came to America not knowing a word of English and right away began looking for a job. He became a chorus teacher and learned to say, "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" After that he joined the Army and learned to say, "Yes sir!" After that he worked at a restaurant and learned to say, "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" After that he worked at a candy store and picked up the words, "Goody-goody gumdrops!"
A few weeks later, there was a murder in the area and he was the first person to be interrogated by the police. The interrogation went as follows:
Policeman: "Who killed the man?" Foreign man: "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" Policeman: "Did you kill the man?" Foreign man: "Yes sir!" Policeman: "What did you use to kill him?" Foreign man: "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" Policeman: "You're under arrest." Foreign man: "Goody-goody gumdrops!"
What do you call a person who smokes?
Smokey the Bear.
Who was the knight on the Round Table that only ate meat?
Sir Loin.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the gay guy's house. Knock, knock. Who's there? Chicken.
Knock knock. Who's there? Ieatmop. I eat mop who? Eww, you eat your poo?
Knock, knock. Who's there? Nobody. Nobody who? (HAHAHAHAHAHA)
I had a friend who was a deep sleeper. One day, a fire started in his house. Now he's a really deep sleeper.
What do you call a blonde who dyes her hair?
Artificial Intelligence.
Fuck you people who made those jokes! (but some were funny but the starving one is messed up!)
There was a guy who got his entire left side cut off. Don’t worry, he is all right now.
Wyatt is a guy who still doesn't have a girlfriend because he didn't sit with Yanely and Jasmine at lunch. Funny joke, huh?
Knock knock.
Who is there?
Cows go.
Cows go who?
No, cows go moooooooooooo, not whooooooooooooooooooooo!
Who needs storage on a computer? Just use an Asian's brain.
Who’s the roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table?
Circumference.
RIP Stephen Hawking who was buried today... he did always love black holes.