Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Esteban.
Esteban who?
If you do not open the door, Esteban you!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Abajo.
Abajo who?
I have abajo of water with me.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11victims, they went through 87 stories in 7seconds
What do you call a hillbilly girl who's faster then her brothers
A redneck virgin
Why did the kid who was blind, in jail, need light to see? He didn't, he needed to braille his way out.
A man enters a bar with some friends, and they all sit down to a drink. After not too long, a man with glasses comes through the front door saying, "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" When no one listens, he shrugs, and everyone watches him go up the stairs. Ten seconds later, he comes back in through the door, again saying, "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" Everyone is amazed, and a few people leave to go fly with him. He keeps coming back into the bar, bringing more and more patrons to join him. The man at the bar is about to join in when the bartender finally sighs.
"For the last time, Superman, get out of my bar, you're drunk and the only person here that can fly!"
The man with glasses frowns.
"Where did all the others go, then?"
What’s the difference between someone who is high on the spectrum [and] low on the spectrum? At least I can write this joke.
Do you know who didn't graduate high school this year?
The Parkland kids.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the bitch house Knock knock Who's there? The chicken
Knock knock.
Who's there?
9/11.
9/11 who?
You said that you would never forget!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
A murderer.
A murderer who--
Is cut off by being murdered.
A robber breaks into a house while the residents are away one dark night. Eager to see what he can loot, he quickly starts searching through cupboards and dressers, grabbing valuables with a trained eye. Suddenly, he hears a voice come out of nowhere. "Jesus is watching you." The criminal jumps, scared the residents are back, and freezes. After a few minutes of silence however, he assumes it was his imagination, and goes back to robbing.
A couple minutes pass, before once again, the voice returns. "Jesus is watching you." Quite confused, the thief searches the house and checks the front door, but nothing pops out as unusual. He finally decides to move rooms, and finds a parrot, but ignores it. Before he can begin to do anything, someone speaks again, "Jesus is watching you." The robber realized it was the parrot talking!
Going to the parrot, he asks it, "Are you the one who's been talking to me?" The parrot responds, "Yes." The thief couldn't believe it. So, he asks another question. "What is your name?" "Ismael." the parrot replies. The man scoffed. "What type of idiot names a parrot Ismael?" The parrot speaks yet again, "The same type of idiot that names a Rottweiler Jesus."
Let’s say there’s a person who should have never come to exist. How would you find them?
A: Look in a mirror.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Depression medicine and therapy.
GO AWAY!
Did you hear about the guy who made the knock-knock joke - I heard he got the Nobel prize.
The person who is reading this.
What do you call a person without a nose and who doesn't know much? Nose-less
Me: Knock knock.
Some dude on the street: Who's there?
Me: Whowhowho.
Dude: Whowhowho who?
Whowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowho.
Two mums hook up!
Their daughter comes in the room and says, "Which one's the baby daddy?"
The "mum" points to the woman who was actually a man!
Who do Chinese people name their kids?
Throw the forks and knives down the stairs.
