New Walk Jokes - Page 31 - Worst Jokes Ever

Doctor: You need new glasses.

Patient: How'd you know? I haven't even told you what is wrong with me yet.

Doctor: I could tell as soon as you walked in through the window.

I was walking to the park and a mystery killed came and shot me 😥😥😥

If you take your dog for a walk and you BOTH use the fire hydrant down at the corner...you might be a Redneck!

So a guy is evading the draft, the cops bang on his door and he runs out the back and through and alley way onto a road. He finds a nun and asks if he can hide under her blouse, she complies and the cops walk by and dont see them. The man comes back up from under the nuns blouse and says”Hey man, youve got a pair of balls!” The nun says, “I didnt wanna be drafted either....”

So I was at home, and I went to take a shower, and I accidentally walked in on my brother having sex with some girl. So I left. A couple minutes later, I needed my headphones to listen to music, so I asked my mom where she was. She told me she was in the shower. Our house only has one bathroom. Sweet home Alabama.

You're walking alone on a street when a person slaps you with a silk glove and runs away. As you watch them run, 2 cops are chasing them

knock knock whos there ken ken who ken you walk the dog for me?

the bear walked into the bar and said can i have a cola and a............wisky the bar tender says whats with the big paws

A girl walked into a job interview. The interviewer said, "You are what we are looking for, but I need to test your skills." He hands her a pen. He said, "Sell me this pen." She puts it between her boobs.

A man who drinks a lot is told by his that if he ever gets drunk again she will leave him. Later the man goes to a pub and drinks a lot and throws up all down his jacket. 'Oh no.' He says to his friend' if I go home like this again, my wife will leave me.' 'Dont worry' his friend says. 'Put a £20 note in your jacket pocket. When your wife challenges you, produce the money and say another man threw up on you and gave you the £20 note for the dry cleaning.' 'Brilliant!' the man says and goes home. He walks through his front door and his wife sees him. She is furious. 'No no' the man says producing the money from his inside pocket. 'A man threw up on me and gave me £20 for the dry cleaning.' 'Whats the other £20 note for?' asks his wife. 'Ah, that's from the man who shat in my pants.....'

So an orphan walked into a store he gets lost and the store clerk asked do you need help finding your parent and the orphan ran out crying

Little Johnny was playing with dick when his teacher walked in the room. She asked him what he was doing, he said Im doing my homework. The teacher saw how big his cock was and asked him to have sex with her. He willingly did so. Little johnny was already 25 so it didn't matter. The only thing was that he was homeschooled.

The Britain’s walk in the house of the alcoholic grandad they ask Mary the mum why she had blood all over her and she said someone dropped the butter they walked into the living room and Thomas was dead on the floor

A German soldier was walking down the street in a hail storm and a woman got hit unconscious he ran over to see if she was ok. Other people came running over they asked what happened and the German soldier said hail hit her

My friend walk down street, wee wee on car

I was walking home then I saw a wait sign a man came and took me I'm still waiting for him to ask for a lesson

So Johnny was working at a deli, a woman walks up and asks, do you have any salad? Johnny says no, she asks? What about carrots? Again Johnny says no, she says what about bananas? Johnny says "tell ya what, spell out "lad" in salad" she spells L A D, Johnny replies "spell "rot" in carrot" she spells R O T, Johnny says "now spell "fuck" in vegetables or fruits" she says "there is no fuck in vegetables or fruits" Johnny exclaims "thats what ive been trying to tell you!"

A man walks into a bar with his pet octopus and proudly claims the animal can play any musical instrument. The bartender pulls out a guitar from behind the bar and gives it to the octopus, which plays an amazing solo. Just then a Scotsman walks into the bar with a set of bagpipes. The octopus grabs the instrument and wrestles around with it on the ground, flailing about, making a horrible sound. The bartender says, "Hey, looks like he can't play that!" and the octopus says, "Play it? As soon as I get it's pajamas off, I'm gonna fuck it!"