Vaccine jokes
Children who are unvaccinated are less likely to have autism. You know why?
-You have to be alive to have autism.
Q: Why was the 4 year old anti-vaxer crying?
A: He was in a mid-life crisis.
I just got my COVID vaccine, and this lady said, "You have no idea what you put in your body." I said, "Yet you are eating chorizo."
How do you get Carrie Underwood to dehydrate fast?
Tell her that all the water supplies contain the COVID vaccine.
Yo mama so ugly,
they won’t give her a vaccine so she can keep wearing her mask.
How to get rid of non-vaccinators: call water a "dehydration vaccine."
Why can't an orphan get a vaccine?
They need parental permission.
Yesterday a woman stabbed me, so I stabbed her back. Then I realized she was the vaccine woman.
Covid be like, "I'm going to take your breath away."
Why is it okay to stab meat, but I can't stab myself? These woke lefties, BLM, Antifa, feminists, eco-warriors, pro-vaccine libtards are stopping your freedom and right to stab yourself!
Chuck Norris doesn't need to be vaccinated. Vaccines need to be Chuck Norrised.
Comment if you're not vaccinated and don't plan to be!
A common question I get as a doctor is, do vaccines cause autism? Well!, I was vaccinated, so.....
How did the other 18 COVIDs go unnoticed?
Q. What's the difference between my phone battery and an anti-vax kid?
A. Nothing, they both die at ten.
Are you corona? Cuz it’s hard to breathe around you ;)
How can you tell an anti-vaccine kid?
It's only got 10 hours to live.