Upbringing jokes
Guys, we should stop making jokes about orphans. Their parents will get mad. Oh.... Wait... Continue.
A black boy walks into the kitchen where his mother is baking and accidentally pulls the flour over onto his head. He turns to his mother and says, “Look Mama, I’m a white boy!” His mother smacks him and says, “Go tell your Daddy what you just said!” The boy finds his father and says, “Look Daddy, I’m a white boy!” His Daddy bends him over, spanks him, stands the boy back up, and says, “Now, what do you have to say for yourself?” The boy replies, “I’ve only been a white boy for five minutes and I already hate you black people!”
I was raised an only child, which really pissed my brother.
Why did the transgender girl want to be a boy?
Because momma never raised no pussy.
An orphan's favorite toy is a boomerang. It comes back to them, unlike their parents.
In life, it’s either yeet or get beat, and I clearly failed yeeting as a child, as my dad beat me.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They stuck her in a round room and told her to find the penny in the corner.
One time my dad was an orphan, so I questioned where he learned to parent.
Why do orphans love elevators?
They raise people!
Grandma: You guy's generation is on too much technology.
Kid: Well, you're the ones that raised us.
Other family members: ...
Imagine not having parents. Lol.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples actually get picked.
We should bully foster parents more for raising parent-less nobodies.
My parents raised me as an only child, which infuriated my sister.
Why can't orphans complete homework?
Because they have no home!
Your Parents
What's a bonus of being an orphan?
You can't get homework.
What happens to an orphan that gets on house arrest?
They get set free.
"I told my mom I thought parenting got easier as the kids get older, and she laughed so hard she cried a little."
Why can't you teach an orphan new tricks?
Because there is no one to teach them.