SOS Jokes

Mama

Yo mama so ugly, when she was born, the doctor tried to put her back in.

Mama

Yo mama so fat, when they buried her, they named her Everest. Mount Everest.

Mama

Yo mama so ugly that when she watched The Outsiders, they became The Insiders.

Mama

Yo mama so strict that when Ponyboy told her that Darry hit him, she called the cops on Darry.

Mama

Yo mama so ugly that when the Kool-Aid Man busted through her wall, he said, “Oh no!”

Bus

I saw a fat woman at the bus stop today, so I asked her, "When's it due?"

She replied, "I'm not fucking pregnant, you rude prick!"

I said, "I meant the bus, you fat cunt!"

Mom

Your earlobes are so big, you can fit your mom inside of them 5000 times and still have room for more!

Tower

Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale? Because they already lost two towers.

Sister

Your sister: You're so ugly.

Me: But we look the same, so who's also ugly?

Wheelchair

My girlfriend broke up with me, so I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?

Yo mama

Yo mama so fat, when she made a joke, only one person laughed at it: the pavement. It was absolutely cracking up!

Marriage

You want to get her pregnant before marriage to know if she's fertile, so why not marry a single mother that already has proof?

Yo mama

Your mom is so fat, she starts the alphabet with the letter "o" for obesity, hahaha!

Twin Towers

Why were the Twin Towers so good at football? They were the best wide receiver of their time!

Coconut

My sis told me that onions are the only food that can make you cry...

So I threw a coconut at her.

Brother

My mom told me that Africans don't have food, so I shipped my fat-ass brother.