Why are baby elephants so smart? They hang out with friends!
Why do people think that monsters are scary? Cuz they are so stupid.
Why are cows 🐮 so big? To scare babies 👶.
The bible says to love your neighbors as you love yourself.
So I treat everyone like garbage.
Q: Why are morbid jokes so cruel?
A: Because they are!
Yo mama so fat Thanos had to clap.
Goats are so lazy these days. Computers have more RAM.
Rose's are red violets are blue fortnite is dead so are you (I have no friends because all of my friends play fortgay just like my friends all of them are gay)
How come Christmas is one time? Because it is so nice!
Fart jokes are so popular because they are real stinkers.
What did the processor say when it was being overclocked?
"Stop it! It hertz so much!"
Two people just met. One said, “We should do some bonding.” The other nodded and said back, “Titanic.” The first just looked confused so the second one just said, “Sorry, thought that would be a good icebreaker.”
Yo mama so hot, she can fit in a mug.
So I was walking.
I wanted to have sex, but I share a room with my brother, so we made a code. "Tomato" for faster, and "cheese" for more, and I shouted, "Tomato, tomato, cheese, cheese." My brother said, "Stop making sandwiches, you're getting mayo on my bed!"
The Cheerio Joke
Let's say you're in high school, and your popularity level was based on what Cheerio you are. So there's Extra-Frosty Cheerios as the most popular kids, the frosted Cheerios were the popular kids, the Regular Cheerios as the typical normal kid, then there's the honey nut Cheerios as the nerds and geeks, and then there's your Cheerio which is the Chocolate Cheerios. Now you want to ask this girl who's an extra frosty, you go up to her and ask her to Homecoming, but she declines.
So after school gets out, you go home and rewind. The next day you wake up feeling like a honey nut Cheerio, so you go up to her again and ask her again, she still says no. So you go home and rewind again and wake up the next morning feeling like a Regular Cheerio. So you go to school and ask her again, she still declines. So you go home and rewind again. The next morning, you wake up feeling like a frosty Cheerio. So you go up to her and ask again, still says no. Then you go home and unwind. The next day you wake up feeling like an extra frosty Cheerio. Feeling doubtful, you go up to her one last time and ask her. She finally says yes.
The next day is Homecoming, and you and your date are on the dance floor, and she wants punch. So she tells you that she's going to go get punch. She goes and gets punch and is back in 30 seconds. You ask her why it was so fast. She replies with; "Oh there wasn't a punch line."
So, my parents were telling me about this dark joke they made 17 years ago, but they didn't actually tell me the joke.
Roses are red violets are blue I have a joke so are you
Friend says, "You were so drunk last night, you threw a mushroom at a midget and said, 'Grow, Mario, grow.'"
Grandma told me that when she passed away she wants to be a tree, and so she could live forever.
But I'm not gonna lie, it was a nice toasty fire...
