An orphan walks into a science lab. The lead scientist greets him and takes him to a DNA testing station. After some procedures, the results come back:
"UNKNOWN"
What’s the difference between Isaac Newton and the kid I kidnapped? Isaac Newton died a virgin.
What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking during a house fire.
What do you call someone smart and dead?
Stephen Hawking...
I love Steven Hawking's stand-up comedy!
There were 3 blonde scientists...wait that’s not the joke. The first one said “we are going to pilot the first unmanned spacecraft to land on the sun.”
The second one said “but we can’t do that - if we get within 5 feet of the sun we’ll freeze to death!”
The third blonde says “so we go at night.”
Why did Stephen Hawking die? Because he got bummed too hard in the shower.
Why did Stephen Hawking fall over?
'Cause he had a screw loose!
Why did Stephen Hawking not believe in God?
Computers don’t really have a specific religion.
Well, if Stephen Hawking likes black holes so much, why did he call security when I put my hole on his face?
EXPERIMENT SUCCESSFUL 😱😱 Scientists have created an element named Pessomium 😳😳
Characteristics: - Highly reactive only in Bolivia and Panama 😡🤬 - Turns invisible when in Brazil or Uruguay 🥵🤧 - Finished 😹🤕 - 0 protons 0 electrons 0 goals 0 assists 7 debuts 🥶
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a refrigerator?
The fridge actually runs.
Stephen Hawking robbed the Apple store looking for a charger.
Stephen Hawking shows up to a car meet-up.
How did Stephen hawking die?of a bad internet connection
I invented a time-traveling machine and traveled back to Pangea. I warned the dinosaurs about the deadly asteroid. They told me, "It wasn't an asteroid... it was Pionel Pessi's penalty ball ricocheted from Mars that made them extinct." Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Pessi!
What is Stephen Hawking's least favorite movie?
Standing Tall.
so, Stephen Hawking walked into a bar- oh, wait a minute!!!! rewind!! so, Stephen Hawking rolled into a bar......
whats the diffrant between stephen hawking and rocket league both of them cant stand up
