Scientist jokes
How do you execute Stephen Hawking?
The electric wheelchair.
At least he always has a shoulder to cry on.
I'll tell you a good joke. Stephen Hawking went for a walk.
Knock knock. Who's there? Beep boop S.t.e.p.h.e.n beep boop H.a.w.k.i.n.g.
Stephen Hawking was a bit of a hardcase. He didn't let people push him around.
Stephen Hawking prefers rolls to slices of bread.
Could never understand why people would say Stephen Hawking is a dead man walking.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
It's me. I can't get in because Stephen Hawking is in the way.
Knock knock. Who's there? Stephen Hawking. Wheelie?
What does E.T. stand for? Because he has little legs.
What does S.H. stand for? He doesn't.
What does S.H. stand for? Shit happens.
Stephen Hawking's best subjects were Physics and Maths. His worst was P.E.
What color is Stephen Hawking's house?
It's a bungalow.
According to scientists, there has been a discovery of water on Mars.
Mars-1
Africa-0
Yo mamma so fat, scientists say she's the closest planet to Earth!
Have you ever walked past Stephen Hawking's house?
No, well neither has he.
What did Stephen Hawking have for breakfast? His left shoulder.
An orphan walks into a science lab. The lead scientist greets him and takes him to a DNA testing station. After some procedures, the results come back:
"UNKNOWN"
Most of us have been somewhere Stephen Hawking hasn’t: Upstairs.
What’s the difference between Isaac Newton and the kid I kidnapped?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking during a house fire.