Piolet jokes

My grandpa killed 100 German soldiers; he was the worst German pilot ever.

Roses are red, violets are violets, my dad died in 9/11 and he was a good pilot.

I should probably stop making jokes about 9/11.

My dad died to it, he was a great pilot.

To become a licensed airline pilot requires 1,500 hours (two years) of training. But it only takes 10 seconds to steal the pilot’s jacket and hat.

What type of file does it take to turn a 4 mm hole to a 44 mm hole?

A pedophile.

A pilot is having a talk with one of his passengers. The passenger asks, "Why did you become a pilot?" The pilot replies with, "To face my fears." The passenger then says, "You're afraid of heights?" "No, I'm afraid of dying alone."

Do trees shit?

Well, how else would we get #2 pencils?

3.14% of sailors are...

π-rates.