PhD jokes

What do you call a spice with a PHD?

Dr. Pepper

The Blonde got a Ph.D.?

Yeah, like that would ever happen.

What do you call a rapper with a PhD?

A rap scholar.

When I was young, I decided to go to a medical school.

At the entrance exam, we were asked to re-arrange letters

'PNEIS'

and form the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect.

Those who answered 'SPINE' are doctors.

Doctor: I diagnose you with obesity.

Patient: It runs in the family.

Doctor: Nothing can run in your family.

Don't worry, Stephen Hawking isn't dead.

They have just got to copy and paste his memory onto a USB.

On a scale of Johnny Depp having an erectile dysfunction to Michael Jackson exposing himself in a child day care center, how hard is it to get into Oxford?