Pandemic jokes
What were the last words of your grandma in 2020?
"Oh, I think I forgot my mask!"
Ever since we started quarantining, I've only been telling inside jokes.
How did the cannibal know the girl he was eating for dinner had COVID-19?
She lost her taste.
All countries will get Covid.
Except China, they got it right off the bat.
Has Covid-19 forced you to wear glasses and a mask at the same time?
You may be entitled to condensation.
COVID is like fashion...
We started hearing about it in Italy...
Became popular in LA and NYC...
Florida ignored it...
And it was all made in China in the end.
My girlfriend got COVID.
This is the perfect time to propose to her. She might just say yes because of the lack of taste.
Cheap oil, no immigration, and no school shootings.
Corona did what Trump promised.
Used to laugh at Michael Jackson for wearing gloves and a mask...
Yet here I am, stuck at home in this COVID-19 "Thriller," beating it...
If your corona test shows two lines, is that then positive or negative?
Dad: Son, everyone in your class got COVID.
Son (in a happy tone): I know.
Dad: How do you know and why are you so glad?
Son: Well, yesterday you told me to spread positivity.
How do you get Carrie Underwood to dehydrate fast?
Tell her that all the water supplies contain the COVID vaccine.
What's the difference between COVID and 9/11?
I've never heard of someone dying in a car accident, and the media blaming it on 9/11.
I got in trouble at school today because I told the teacher at school with COVID to stay positive.
You're so ugly that they faked a whole pandemic just so you can put on a mask to cover that ugly-ass face.
What do you call it when everyone of your friends makes too many dumb Covid jokes? A pundemic.
Your hairline and your eyebrows are social distancing.
A friend called me a while back saying, "I have COVID.... I can't breathe, I really have a hard time breathing."
I reply saying, "Dude, you need to work on your George Floyd jokes."
Chuck Norris has come in contact with Covid.
Covid is now in a 14-day quarantine.
Why is Joe Biden afraid of getting COVID?
Because he'd lose his sense of smell.