Ogre jokes

Your hairline is so ugly, I thought you were Shrek!

Shrek once went to the movies and when he sat down he felt this slimy and sticky feeling on the chair, so he stood up and complained about his chair being dirty... until he realized that he forgot to wipe earlier... so he stopped complaining and went back to his chair and sat back down.

Your mom is so ugly even Shrek ran away from her.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Shrek thought he was ugly until he saw you.

What do Shrek and onions have in common?

*LAYERS*

What did Shrek say to the princess? “I love walls!”

So a girl says, "You're so ugly to me," and she says, "I’m the prettiest girl." I say, "Yeah, a pretty girl for an ogre 👹!"

*Shrek* Bend ogre.

Shrek yells at Donkey. Fiona yells, "Stop yelling at the ass!"

What's green and furry?

Fiona from Shrek.