I dated a German girl, it was very annoying when she kept on screaming her age and moaning.
me: i’m going to get burrito 🌯
friend : you can have my burrito baby
gay
friend : begins to moan
me : finna hang up
why dont vegetarians moan during sex?
Because they dont want to admit that meat makes them happy
What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? She gagged and moaned.
Why can't Jordan moan?
Because his parents are in the room next to him. Asleep.
Q: Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand?
A: So she can moan with the other.
So Jesus has been nailed to the cross. On the first day, he starts to moan, "Peter, Peter".
Well, Peter hears Jesus moaning and feels it is important, so begins to go up the hill. On his way, he is met by some Roman soldiers and they proceed to beat his ass back down the hill.
On the second day, Peter hears Jesus moaning again, "Peter, Peter".
Peter thinks to himself, this is important. He heads up the hill, fights past the first line, but gets a beatdown by the second group and back down the hill he goes.
On the third day, Peter is woken up by Jesus sounding very weak, but calling out, "Peter, Peter".
Peter feels that whatever it is that Jesus needs him for, must be very important. Peter heads up the hill, he is on a mission. He manages to fight his way thru three sets of Roman guards and make his way to the cross Jesus has been nailed to for three days. He looks up to Jesus, and says "Jesus, I have heard your calls, what is so important"?
Jesus- "Peter, I can see your house from here".
my sister reminds me of 911 one moan of OMG got everyone's attention.
