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Semen

Shitpost master-general · 8 months ago

A screenshot of two 4chan posts. The top post features a greentext story and a picture of the anime character Cirno. The text claims the author used their own semen as a skincare product overnight and it cured their acne. The bottom post features a picture of Konata Izumi and a reply stating the user is going to try it, hoping it isn't a prank.

School

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

An image depicting a large, mother Pikachu-like creature lying on a furry surface, with multiple smaller, baby Pikachu-like creatures surrounding her, some suckling from her teats. A red and white Poké Ball is visible on the left. The text overlaid on the image reads: "I hate school" mfs the second they step into 4th period.

Cat

Paytonnn · 1 year ago

A still image of Bernie Sanders, an older man with white hair and glasses, wearing a brown winter coat, standing outdoors in a snowy or cold environment. He looks directly at the camera with a serious expression. Above the image, text reads 'Me: My cat at 4am:'. Below him, superimposed text on a dark bar reads 'I am once again asking for your constant attention and salmon.'

Schedule

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A black and white image of a muscular man with a beard above an image that lists a schedule including waking up, masturbating, saying "Gm" in the group chat, being ignored, and stating he will kill himself.

Alarm

Nintendo Fan · 1 year ago

The image shows a person lying on the ground while four people in riot gear stand over them. The person on the ground is labeled "ME" and the people in riot gear are labeled with times: 7:00, 7:05, 7:10, 7:15. The text on the image says: "When you set your alarm every 5 minutes in the morning."

Time

opal💫 · 1 year ago

A chart showing the times of the day from 1 am to 12 pm, with a cheese icon next to each of the morning times (am) and a steak icon next to each of the afternoon times (pm).

Schedule

DAP ME UP · 1 year ago

Rate my daily schedule

The image shows a daily schedule. It lists activities from waking up at 6 AM to going to sleep at 3 or 4 AM, including school, meals, chores, and walking the dog. It also mentions snacks, specifically "3 grilled cheeses on hamburger buns."

Hand

Anonymous · 2 years ago

When someone asks why we wash hands AFTER the bathroom...

A man with a shocked expression and hands up to his head in front of a blue background. The text on the image reads: "When someone asks why we wash hands AFTER the bathroom..."

Poop

kate✨ · 2 years ago

A confused cat is looking at the camera. The text says: "My cat confused why I'm stealing his poop, putting it in a bag and taking it into another room."

Hair

shaylie lol · 2 years ago

The image shows a cartoon character of Marge Simpson pulling at her hair, with another version of Marge coming out of her pulled hair. The text at the top says, "My mom when she brushed my hair for school." There is a web address at the bottom, "boredpanda.com".

Monkey

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A drawing shows a monkey sitting in a "restraint chair" hooked up to tubes that deliver "drum n bass" and "iced coffee" to his brain. The monkey is also given "adderall" and a beer, "Miller High Life". He has a plate of "crab rangoon sustenance" in front of him. The monkey's hand is placed on a "response bar" facing the screen labelled "Twitter".

Son

Smãll Kîng Dãvîd · 2 years ago

Question and answer 🙄

A cartoon drawing shows a mother standing at a door, asking her son where he is going. The son, with a backpack, sarcastically replies that he is going to heaven, since he is clearly in his school uniform.

Tea

Gummy gummy gummy bear · 2 years ago

Who doesn't know it? 😂

The image shows four steps to making tea with a stick figure pouring boiling water into a cup, followed by a timer and finally an empty cup. The text reads "1. Drop tea bag", "2. Pour boiled water", "3. Let it cool down", and "4. Forget you made tea."

Coffee

BellaTrix · 3 years ago

A woman with messy hair is screaming with her mouth open. The text reads: WHEN I DON'T GET MY MORNING COFFEE

Nap

Rylee ੈ♡˳ · 3 years ago

on school days too..

A person with messy hair looking tired. The text on the image says: "When you go for a 20 minute nap and wake up 7 hours later."

Wheelchair

Cocel 😮💨 · 3 years ago

A character from Scooby-Doo looks perplexed. The text above says: "Me: walks over to the kitchen to drink something. The person who pushed my wheelchair for 18 years:".

Morning

hayden💯💯💯 · 3 years ago

goofy ahh

The image is a two-panel comparison. The top panel shows a woman smiling and stretching in bed, with the text "Girls in the morning:". The bottom panel shows several hotdog buns with a sausage placed in one, with the text "Boys in the morning:".

Shower

Lostin Flowers · 3 years ago

Reasons for having a shower

A pie chart shows that the main reason for taking a shower is to have 10 minutes to think about everything that's gone wrong in your life. Only a small sliver of the chart is dedicated to nice warm water and getting clean.

Parent

✨Jassy✨ · 3 years ago

Parents during breaks and weekends

A man in a light blue shirt, suspenders, and a patterned tie looks directly at the camera. Above his head, in a bold white font on black background, it reads: "Yeah, if you could go back to school." Below his chest, on another black background, it reads: "That'd be great." In the lower right corner in small gray text is written: quickmeme.com

Coffee

✨Jassy✨ · 3 years ago

My mom after she has had enough of us

The image shows a man in a suit with text overlayed that reads, "Half the day, I wonder if it's too late for coffee. The other half, I wonder if it's too early for alcohol."

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