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FBI

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a tweet that says "the actual FBI showed up to my parents house because of this post" with another tweet saying "get out there and vote". Underneath there is a picture of a bomb with the word "Ballot" under it and an image of the supreme court with "Ballot BOX" under it.

Setup

Anonymous · 3 years ago

Salute to this awesome setup

Coke

Wade · 2 years ago

COCaine

A cartoon figure with red and white face, big eyes, and a pointy hat appears to be dancing. Next to it, another cartoon figure with a smaller body and a jester hat looks dizzy or dazed. The text says: "POMNI I HAVE SNORTED A SUITCASE FULL OF COKE AND I'M STARTING TO FEEL THE AFFECTS! HAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHA"

Boyfriend

stillwaiting.. · 3 years ago

A phone screen shows a text message conversation with the last message reading "My boyfriend", followed by two images of Kermit the frog. The first image is Kermit looking at a phone with a shocked expression. The second image is Kermit laying on the floor and having his chest compressed.

Potato

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A close-up shot of a blue bowl filled with mashed potatoes and a pat of butter on top. The text above reads: "Food for thought: Are mashed potatoes just Irish guacamole?" The text below states: "Kerry O'Shea | June 11, 2019-01:18 PM"

Egg

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

Two tweets are shown. The first tweet says: "Imagine walking 2km to hatch an egg and it turning out to be a fucking magikarp." The second tweet is by user Magikarp The Fish saying: "imagine waiting nine months to give birth and it's you"

Morning

shaylie lol · 2 years ago

A cartoon girl with messy hair looks groggy. Text above her says: "When ya momma wake u up in the morning and u fall back asleep and you hear her coming."

Florida Man

tabs1528 · 1 year ago

The top image shows two Coast Guard officers standing on a boat, looking at a person in a large inflatable bubble. The bottom image has a young man with a questioning expression. The text reads: "Florida Man Who Tried to 'Run' to Bermuda in Inflatable Bubble Rescued by Coast Guard, Again. AGAIN...?"

Colon

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A compilation of five tweets. The top left tweet by Sarah says: 'when you hug a guy and you smell his colon 💕'. The top right tweet by tayLORD says: 'When you can still smell his colon on your pillows even though he's not there >>>>>'. The large central tweet by RichOrb says: 'I love when I can smell a guy's colon as he walks by 😍'. The bottom left tweet by jen says: 'after you hug a boy and you smell like his colon <33'. The bottom right tweet by Stylish Sweetheart says: 'I smell like his colon now ♡'. The tweets all mistakenly use the word 'colon' instead of 'cologne'.

Dick

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A Twitter post with a user asking a hypothetical question about getting their penis stuck in a ketchup bottle, followed by two replies.

Account

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The first part shows a tweet from the National Park Service stating: "You know it's cold outside when you go outside and it's cold." Below that is a reply from heychrisjones stating "Who is running this account?" The second part shows a reply from the National Park Service that contains an image. The image shows a marmot wearing a headset and sitting at a computer in an office setting.

Kamala Harris

Willy b · 1 year ago

A screenshot of a social media post on a dark background. The top half shows a news broadcast split-screen featuring Tucker Carlson on the left and David Daleiden, identified as a pro-life activist, on the right. The text on the news image mentions "Kamala wanted to obstruct investigation into the sale of baby body parts." The post text below reads: "When two undercover investigators secretly taped Planned Parenthood admitting selling baby parts (a felony), Calif Attorney General prosecuted the undercover investigators, NOT Planned Parenthood. That Attorney General was Kamala Harris."

Mask

Anonymous · 2 years ago

A screenshot of a tweet that reads: "pussy tighter than an aztec clay face mask."

Market

Anonymous · 1 year ago

People will bet on everything... ...I mean nothing.

A screenshot of a prediction market titled "Nothing Ever Happens: May." The market rules state that it will resolve to "No" if Russia and Ukraine agree to a ceasefire, the next Pope is Black, the Fed cuts rates, India invades Pakistan, or Israel or the US take military action against Iran. Otherwise, it will resolve to "Yes."

Minion

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A screenshot of a Twitter exchange. The first user asks the official Minions account if they used to work for Hitler. The Minions account replies "no silly we only work for villians!"

Account

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A screenshot of a thermostat displaying an error message that reads "Account Terminated. Your behaviour has violated the OJ Family Code of Conduct. Reason: Leaking United States classified documents. This thermostat has been locked." The time on the screen is "Fri 1:30 PM" and the temperature is "-964°C". The text "they done banned me from the thermostat" is overlayed at the bottom.

Time

opal💫 · 1 year ago

A chart showing the times of the day from 1 am to 12 pm, with a cheese icon next to each of the morning times (am) and a steak icon next to each of the afternoon times (pm).

Friend

blach66 · 3 years ago

The image shows a text message conversation. The first message says, "We had a deal, Logan, if you sent me Gary pictures, no waffles." The second message below says, "I FORGOT". Above the messages is the text "I need new friends."

Text message

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A text message conversation. It starts with a message from "fbi agent" saying "You welcome, don't mess this up king". Followed by a question "Wyd", the reply "playing xbox with the boys", then "you?" and finally a message saying: "Parents aren't home come over".

WhatsApp

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

The image shows a mockup of a WhatsApp chat interface with Friedrich Engels' picture on the right. The WhatsApp screen shows a conversation with Karl Marx repeatedly messaging "I NEED money". The text above reads "WHAT IF FRIEDRICH ENGELS HAD WHATSAPP" with laughing emojis next to it.

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