Worst Jokes Ever

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Open Memes

𝐋𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧 𝐅𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐬

Boeing

The image contains the text "When one door closes, another one opens." - Boeing attributed to Boeing

Blach66.1

A screenshot of the Google Play Store page for the Kuda money app, which is advertised as being for Africans. Text overlaid on the image questions the phrasing, suggesting the app is for "Africans for money".

Heroin Monkey

1) buy a lobster
[deleted] by
My friend is in forensics and works on crime
scenes. They find a woman laying on the
bathroom floor with a head wound and live
baby shrimp on the floor with a smell of burnt
residue. After 3 days of investigation, they
figured out what happened.
Long story short, she bought a lobster from
the market. In the market, they feed the
lobster live baby shrimp until they're sold. This
woman brings the lobster home, inserts the
lobster's tail into her vagina, lights a lighter
and puts the flame towards the lobster's head,
so the lobster will frantically start shaking his
tail (which is inside her vagina), giving her the
jollies. Apparently she killed the lobster from
burning his head too long, the lobster, being
dead, voids his bowels, causing this lobster to
shit live baby shrimp into her vagina. This
woman then goes to pee and sees live baby
shrimp crawling out of her vagina, she freaks
out, falls, and cracks her head open on the
bathtub and dies.
it happened in Chicago in 2001
?
---
14
1) wait for horny
Chicago 2001
"Lobster Love" Incident

Heroin Monkey

A cartoon image of Spongebob's front door with two green balls stuck in the crack. The text says "Spongebob open the door. My balls are stuck."

Heroin Monkey

A white chicken stands on a skateboard. There is text that says, "I'm outside bitch open the door".

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a text list titled 'Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator'. The list provides humorous and absurd actions to perform inside an elevator.

Heroin Monkey

A list of ten things to do in an elevator. The text reads: Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator. 1. Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. 2. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?" 3. Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!" 4. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking. 5. Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on". 6. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly. 7. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral. 8. Dress up as the devil and then ask other people as they get in, "Going down?" 9. Drag a desk into the elevator. Ask "Do you have an appointment?" 10. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."

Heroin Monkey

An advertisement shows a pink rubber device shaped like lips next to a woman who is wearing the same device over her mouth. Below the image, the text reads: "Amazing Inventions Definition.org OPEN".

Wade

The image shows a series of posts. The first post asks, "Remember in college you were making out with Betty from your CompSci class and she put a finger up your butt. So you started questioning your sexual preference?" with a reply, "IT WAS MY FINGER BARRY!". The second post starts with, "Remember when you were jacking off with no clothes on for the first time just to try it out? Remember when your Mom walked by and saw everything, even though you were sure that you had closed the door?" followed by the reply, "It was me, Barry! I opened the door! And don't think for a moment that I didn't see everything too!!". The third post reads, "Remember that wet dream that ruined your favorite cartoon bed spread as a teen?!" with the reply "IT WAS ME, BARRY! I JERKED YOU OFF IN YOUR SLEEP!!"

ɮǟʀօռ ɦɛʟʍʊȶ zємσ

A man with blond hair in a superhero costume stands with his arms outstretched. He is surrounded by people reaching towards him. Text overlay says: "Opening a pack of gum." and "Everyone in my class.". A pack of Trident gum floats near his outstretched hand.

Wade

Sold out

The image shows a meme with the text 'Five nights at Freddy's movie opening weekend be like'. It shows a stick figure labeled 'Fnaf fan' diving towards the lower image and a woman labeled 'October 27' who is crawling in the other direction. The bottom right corner includes a watermark saying 'MEMES'.

Wade

Good Question….Beavis and Butthead should be on here too

The image shows three panels. The top panel depicts Wolverine with his claws out with the text "WHO HAS" written in green. The middle panel shows Deadpool with a serious face, with the text "THE BEST" also in green. The bottom panel shows Tom from Tom and Jerry with his hand appearing as if his fingers are just grown back, with the text "HEALING FACTOR" in green.

Ghosty

Guys is this normal?

A screenshot of a Discord conversation showing an ongoing call that has lasted for 125113 hours, 0 minutes, and 39 seconds. The user 'fleperd' is the main participant in the conversation. There are other messages and missed calls visible. Text on top shows 'scooter, come here - Worst Jo X' which is a tab open in the user's browser.

✨Jassy✨

I hate it when that happens

Mr. Krabs from Spongebob Squarepants with his mouth wide open and tongue sticking out as if he is in great pain. The text above reads: "When you swallow a tortilla chip and it slowly slices your throat open on the way down."

DreamBlue

The image is a four-panel meme. The top left panel shows a dark, shadowy face, looking distressed. The text next to it reads, "I didn't study for the test." The bottom left panel shows a brightly lit face, grinning slightly. The text next to it reads, "It's multi-choice and open-book."

the taste of mommy's milk

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A close-up photo of a cat looking up with its head slightly tilted back. The text on the image reads "POV: Your iPhone when you try to open it using FaceID."

🌙✨⭐️That Hijabi Girl⭐️✨🌙

Why is this true?

Spongebob is looking into an open fridge with a sly smile. The text above him reads, "Me opening the fridge to see which quarantine snack I want to eat next." There is a Kelp Milk carton and other food items in the fridge.

Daddy Cock

shrek=daddy

The image shows a close-up of Shrek's face, looking surprised and slightly grotesque. Text at the top reads: "When you accidentally open your front-facing camera."

⭐️🌙✨SUNNA AHMAD✨🌙⭐️

Me 6 years ago when I be opening a chip bag :

The image depicts two animated characters. One is a blue figure, and the other is a green tree character. The blue character appears to be struggling with the green tree. The text above the characters reads, "3 year old me trying to get a chip bag open," and the text at the bottom of the image reads, "But... how do you open this thing? It, it won't... budge!"

✨Jassy✨

Stupid Bitches

The image shows a two panel meme with the top panel text reading "me: opens sunroof" and the bottom panel text reading "everyone else on the submarine:". Below that is a surprised Pikachu.

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