Worst Jokes Ever

Popular

Difference jokes

Depression jokes

Twin Towers jokes

Little Johnny jokes

Offensive jokes

Michael Jackson jokes

Stephen Hawking jokes

Worst Jokes Ever

Light Memes

Heroin Monkey

1) buy a lobster
[deleted] by
My friend is in forensics and works on crime
scenes. They find a woman laying on the
bathroom floor with a head wound and live
baby shrimp on the floor with a smell of burnt
residue. After 3 days of investigation, they
figured out what happened.
Long story short, she bought a lobster from
the market. In the market, they feed the
lobster live baby shrimp until they're sold. This
woman brings the lobster home, inserts the
lobster's tail into her vagina, lights a lighter
and puts the flame towards the lobster's head,
so the lobster will frantically start shaking his
tail (which is inside her vagina), giving her the
jollies. Apparently she killed the lobster from
burning his head too long, the lobster, being
dead, voids his bowels, causing this lobster to
shit live baby shrimp into her vagina. This
woman then goes to pee and sees live baby
shrimp crawling out of her vagina, she freaks
out, falls, and cracks her head open on the
bathtub and dies.
it happened in Chicago in 2001
?
---
14
1) wait for horny
Chicago 2001
"Lobster Love" Incident

Heroin Monkey

A picture of a small kitten, illuminated by a bright light with text on top that reads "Fully charged".

Heroin Monkey

A painting of Jesus with his arms outstretched. In the middle of the picture there are two drawings of characters, one of Satan as Soyjak and one of Jesus as Chad. The text reads, "As you can see, Satan, I portrayed you as Soyjak and me as Chad. You and your legions have been defeated once again. L+cope+seethe+touch light."

Heroin Monkey

The image is a screenshot of a 4chan post with green text on a black background. It depicts a dystopian scenario in a future where Hillary Clinton has become a supreme ruler and implemented a series of drastic measures.

Heroin Monkey

A yellow rectangular alarm device with the text "SMORK" on top and "ALAM" at the bottom. Two small light bulbs are in the center, the right one green.

M3ME G0D

The text reads: "Did anyone else's parents used to drive them around neighborhoods to look at people's Christmas lights and it used to be the most exciting thing ever??"

timmyy

82%

The image shows a scene from Teletubbies. There are four Teletubbies, Tinky Winky (purple), Dipsy (green), Laa-Laa (yellow), and Po (red), standing in a field. Dipsy is glowing with a light. The text “Look!” appears over the center of the image.

EnochTyr

...maybee

Mickey Mouse is looking sly. The text above him says: "When someone asks you why you're carrying a strobe light into an epilepsy ward." The text below him says: "It's a surprise tool that will help us later."

$omedipsh!t2011

Light Yagami is being a bit rasict

A two-panel image. The left panel shows Light Yagami with an intense look. The right panel shows Ryuk with a surprised expression. The text in between reads: "AFRICA!" "Um, Light, that's not how it works." "MEXICO!"

✨Jassy✨

Tonights gonna be a good good night

The image shows text above a photo of two men dancing. The text says, "Thomas Edison: *invents light bulb* Moths in 1879:". The two men are in a dance pose.

blach66

The image shows four images arranged in a grid with a black background. The text at the top of each column reads: 'The Him,' 'My Shit,' 'Super Smexy Spongebob,' and 'Light Switches.' Below these are, respectively, a yellow head with pecs, a Pou game image, a Spongebob image, and a light switch. At the bottom, it reads 'Heaviest Objects In The Universe'

bruce

A picture of Ed, a man with a beard, looking slightly amused. Text on the image reads: "WHEN YOU FART ON A ZOOM CALL AND THEN YOUR NAME LIGHTS UP."

blach66

The image presents a comparison of speeds, with four sections each with a cartoon image, a bar indicating the speed, and a name. The first section depicts a cheetah running, with a small yellow bar labeled 'CHEETAH'. The second section shows an airplane flying, with a medium yellow bar labeled 'AIRPLANE'. The third section features a yellow ball moving with speed lines, and has a long red bar labeled 'SPEED OF LIGHT'. The fourth section contains a rage comic character and a very long red bar labeled 'THE SPEEDS MY FARTS TRAVEL AT'. The fourth section also has a biohazard icon.

✨Jassy✨

me every night

A man in a black vest and pants is shown in a posed stance against a blurry background, with text overlaid on top and bottom. The text says: "When you turn the lights off and try to find your bed."

PokemonCardMemeBoiiii

A yellow Pokémon card with a depiction of a black television screen. The card includes the name 'TV' and its 'Bright Light' and 'Speaker Blast' attacks. It's described as a 'Flat-screen plasma television Pokémon'.

hayden💯💯💯

🤣🤣

A man with a red hat and light substance on his mouth looks to the side. The text overlay reads, "Dark skinned brothers when they see a naked light skin guy in the shower. Got anymore them light skinned penises."

DADDY sus aka the king

the best light skin stare

TechPriestGotDrip

A red Bionicle character with a sword is surfing on lava. Above it, the text reads: "Her: Come over. Me: I can't, I'm awakening Mata Nui. Her: I have the Mask of Light. Me:"

✨Jassy✨

Like if you can relate and comment if you think this is funny

The image consists of two panels. The top panel shows a text saying "7 y/o me in my dad's car: Dad, I wanna turn on the light. Can I press this button?" with an image of a hand about to press a car light button. The bottom panel shows a text saying "My dad:" with an image of the character Rocket Racoon from the movie Guardians of the Galaxy saying "No!! That's the button that will kill everyone".

GG Miller

On everything i did all this

The image shows a yellow Minion character with a heart sticker on its cheek. The text "ADMIT IT" is at the top, followed by "You've done one of these:" then five common relatable experiences are listed such as walking into a room and forgetting why.

1
2
3