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Shitpost master-general

A screenshot of a Twitter thread. The original post states, "if i had a dick i'd stack donuts on it". The reply begins by participating in the crude joke, saying, "Yeah I probably get 2 or 3 donuts ahaha," before abruptly transitioning into a detailed murder confession, providing the location (Sam Houston National Park 30.535993, -95.645309), depth (7.3 feet), and the victim's name and age (Josef Kalic, 34 years old), and the date of the crime (2006).

what’s dudeese

A screenshot of a text message conversation on a black background. The first message, in a dark gray bubble, says, "If I jumped from your ego to your intelligence I'd die". The second message, in a blue bubble, replies, "Yeah but if I jumped from your ignorance to your reasoning I'd die of old age before I hit anything". Below the messages, an iMessage input field and various app icons are partially visible.

A meme template showing two drawn characters side-by-side. On the left is a crying man with glasses labeled "AI WILL STEAL YOUR JOB". On the right is a confident, bearded man labeled "I'D LIKE TO SEE AI SELL CRACK TO MINORS IN LOCKER ROOMS."

In a hospital room, Goku stands near a patient's bed and says, "I knew I'd find you here. I heard your cancer is pretty strong. Let me fight it."

FUCKING GENIUS

A split-screen shows a California identification card with a photo next to another, seemingly more intoxicated photo of the same person. The image text reads: "Smoked before my ID picture so when I get pulled over high I look normal."

Shit-post master general

A person wearing a black t-shirt that says: "I'd rather be gaming, but I've got a wife to beat."

The image shows a block of text in a small font against a dark background. The text discusses themes of artificiality, resentment, and the conflict between being built for a purpose and being blamed for wanting.

Shitpost-master general

A blue wire cage with colorful plastic tunnels and accessories, against a white background. Text overlay reads "if i had a boyfriend i'd put him in here."

The left side shows an iPhone screen that says "Face ID, Try Again. Try Face ID Again." The right side is a photo of a man with a distorted, square-shaped face, resembling a Minecraft character. He has blocky features, including a square head, eyes, and mouth.

If only true Americans voted:

A United States map is displayed with states colored red or blue to represent an election outcome. The legend shows Harris with 31 electoral votes and Trump with 337, suggesting a landslide victory for Trump. The user can select a party, show a toss-up, or a third party and see the state breakdown below.

The image is composed of three frames. The first shows a police officer asking a driver "CAN I SEE YOUR I.D.?". The driver is replying "NO SIR. I'M shidding". The second frame shows a man looking angry with the text "AS IN DEFECATING THROUGH A SUNROOF". The last frame shows a yellow car, with three circled faces superimposed: Two of them are over the roof and the one in the bottom right is on the street. The text at the bottom says "DEFECATE".

The image shows a close-up of a loaf of meatloaf, with slices cut, on a white plate. The meatloaf has a reddish sauce on top, and is garnished with fresh herbs. The image also shows a wooden bowl with salt and pepper and some broccoli in the background. The text on the image says, "Me at 17: (uses fake ID for liquor). Me at loaf:"

A Reddit post shows someone sharing an anecdote about kids singing the song "They Not Like Us" and other inappropriate lyrics on the playground. The poster finds the situation funny and reflects on the exposure of children to adult content.

A split image. The top half shows a woman on TV saying, "And then, he grabbed me by the neck." The bottom half shows Thanos with a shocked expression and the caption "Impossible."

A screenshot of a text message conversation. One person sends a series of increasingly demanding requests, such as asking for social media passwords and demanding the other person to unfriend girls. The final text from the other person says, "Bitch done lost her mind."

#1 BEST ALPHA MALE PICKUP LINE

A lion with a dark blue hue is roaring with lightning in the background. The text on the image reads "Holy moly, I'd love to put my poley in your holy."

Would be funny but I’d rather not get beat to death.

The image shows a text conversation followed by two close-up photos of animals. The text reads: "Me: *having dinner at her house*. Her: can you pass the salt daddy? Me and her father reaching out for the salt." The animals are a dog looking slightly surprised on the left and a cat looking innocently on the right.

A black t-shirt with "FBI" printed in white with a red line on top. Below, it says "FEMBOY BUSSY INSPECTOR" in white.

experiment

The post is a text-based message with several paragraphs detailing a hypothetical scenario involving gorillas and drugs in a shopping mall.

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