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Text message

JakeFromFakeFarm · 3 years ago

Too relatable

A screenshot of a text conversation with "Mom" shows messages that read, "Where are you? x," followed by a series of replies from the other party that escalate from "I'm coming hoe" to "*home," then "Home!" and "HOM!" ending with "Fucking piece of shit". The second, third and fourth message shows a red exclamation mark, indicating that the message has not been delivered.

Sexuality

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

Neighbor

Wade · 2 years ago

Neighbor

The image is a four-panel comic strip. In the first panel, a priest at a pulpit says, "Love your neighbor as yourself." In the second panel, a woman waves at a man from her car and says, "Hello neighbor." In the third panel, the woman yells, "You fucking moron." at the man. In the fourth panel, the man yells at the woman, "You worthless piece of human shit."

Semen

Anonymous · 2 years ago

English spelling at its finest.

A screenshot of a Tumblr post. The first post reads, "You can't spell 'advertisements' without 'semen' between the 'tits'." The second post asks, "What in the fuck did I just read?" The third post says, "Not all heroes wear capes".

Lgbt

Anonymous · 2 years ago

A screenshot of a Tweet by Mc Donald's that says: "LGBT pissing me the fuck off tonight."

Life

ℑ𝔪 𝔚𝔦𝔱𝔥 𝔖𝔱𝔲𝔭𝔦𝔡 · 3 years ago

shut the fuck up you pussy ass fucking bitch motherfucking parent depleater

The image shows three dogs, each labeled with a word. On the left is "my car", in the middle is "me" and on the right is "work". "Me" is in the middle pulling a toy labeled "money" away from "my car" and towards "work". The text above the dogs says "How life is going right now".

Infidelity

Anonymous · 1 year ago

Shitpost-master general

A meme featuring a couple lying in bed. The woman is thinking that her partner is clueless about her infidelity with his best friend. The man wonders why she tastes like Steve's dick.

Men

Daddy Cock · 2 years ago

Men (I LOVE DICK) FUCK YOU BY THE WAY

The image shows a comparison between how women and men interact. At the top, the text says "Women get together and tall about their feelings." Below are four men making the word "DICK" with their bodies. The lower part of the picture shows the shadows of two women and a bench on a sidewalk.

Male

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image is a screenshot of a 4chan conversation with two photos attached. The first photo shows a very simple, mostly white bedroom with a bed, a ceiling fan, and a window. The second photo shows a bedroom with a wooden nightstand next to a bed, a green lamp, a bottle of beer, and a pizza box on the nightstand. The text above the photos reads: "Do males really live like this?" The subsequent messages are "yeah although I put a cool t-rex lamp next to my bed", "that's fucking sick dude" and "based t-rex chad"

Story

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a green cartoon character with red eyes. Below the image is text of a story about a date gone wrong, ending with the line "That's my story of how I got cockblocked by motherfucking al qaeda."

Story

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A black and white cartoon drawing depicting a text written in a diary, describing how Patty got a secret out, and then the person was sent to the vice principal's office. Then, the person heard a bouncing noise, laughter, and giggling, followed by two voices sounding like they were having sex in school. A drawing of a person standing in front of lockers is below the text. Another line of text says, "I opened the door, and oh boy, you'll be surprised about who I saw." A number "2" is at the bottom of the page.

Girl

Anonymous · 2 years ago

A screenshot of a text message exchange. The first message reads: "Aye dumbass your girl cheating on you." The second message reads: "I'm blind." The third message reads: "Oh shit", followed by another message written in braille and reading: "Sorry, I can't see you." The final message reads: "That fucking whore."

Boss

Wade · 2 years ago

Zamboni

The image is a panel of six frames. In the first frame, a man is on his hands and knees laughing, with a Zamboni in the background. The second frame shows Deadpool saying, "You're about to be killed by a zamboni." The third frame is a close-up of the man. The fourth frame is Deadpool saying "Tell me where your fucking boss is!" The fifth frame shows a large, empty seating area. The last frame shows an ice rink with the caption "...in five minutes."

Speed

ℑ𝔪 𝔚𝔦𝔱𝔥 𝔖𝔱𝔲𝔭𝔦𝔡 · 2 years ago

real

A man with a wide, slightly maniacal smile is in the bottom part of the image. Above him in white letters it says: "Driving at 200 mph in a school zone:".

Tower

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A picture of the Tower of Babel being bombed, with an explosion on one of the towers. The text in the picture reads: "THEY HIT THE FUCKING..."

Leader

Anonymous · 1 year ago

A screenshot of a social media exchange under the question "US recession in 2025?" One user accuses Trump of being a traitor, another asks why they haven't made any bets. The user replies that they are from North Korea where gambling is forbidden. Another user then says that because of that user's comment about their "supreme leader", the user will be executed.

Stare

Anonymous · 1 year ago

Shitpost-master general

The image shows a split panel. The top panel contains the phrases "Stop looking at me like that" and "Stop fucking staring at me." The bottom panel is split between an anime character with tears streaming down their face and a white cat staring intensely at the viewer.

Identity

The RĒAL RB · 1 year ago

Proof that Heroin Monkey is OPAL

A screenshot of an online chat conversation. Multiple users are present: IndieRockBoat, RapBoat, Opal, Cosmo the Intern, and Heroin Monkey. The conversation shows IndieRockBoat repeatedly asking "Any of you listen to indie rock?" and then stating "sorry I live in McDonald's my internet is bad." RapBoat then comments, "That's how I know it's Heroin Monkey, he ALWAYS does that." Opal then insults RapBoat with crude language, which RapBoat then repeats back, seemingly as if impersonating Opal, and adds further crude remarks. The critical exchange occurs at the end: RapBoat asks, "You want me to pull an AG???" Heroin Monkey replies, "yes." Immediately after, RapBoat types, "Heroin Monkey yes." Below this, a final line states, "Bro forgot to switch alts."

Wife

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A screenshot from what looks like a children's show, showing a man in an orange shirt in the center with Elmo and another muppet next to him. The text says: "While the rest of them are telling Mr. Johnson not to jump, Elmo antagonizes him by telling him he fucked his wife too."

Cat

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

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