It ain't always easy having erectile dysfunction, but it sure as hell ain't hard.
People having seizures are just people dreaming about rollercoasters.
My family loves to have dance parties. My dad will just play music from his iPod, and I'll go to the light switch and make a nice strobe light effect. Everyone loves it, especially my younger cousin. He gets down on the floor and starts breakdancing! It makes him so happy, and he needs that extra joy in his life, especially since the doctor recently diagnosed him with epilepsy.
Patient: "I'm starting to forget things."
Doctor: "Since when have you had this condition?"
Patient: "What condition?"
Hey girl are you osteoporosis, because your giving me a "Bone" condition
How would you best describe prostate cancer?
Well, it is somewhere between a dick and an asshole!
Why do they have air conditioning in hospitals?
To keep all the vegetables fresh.
Why is there AC in hospitals?
To keep all the vegetables fresh.
My friend's mother thought a kid who had autism and Down syndrome called him a "double down."
What is the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
What do you call all down syndromes?
Twins.
What happens when you have a kid with Torrets and a hair trigger? The Las Vegas shooting
What do you call a kid having a seizure on a dance floor? An improvement
Q: Where do you find a quadriplegic?
A: Right where you left 'em.
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant.
After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing diapers!”
She replies: “Oh my god! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?”
To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
Old man goes to the doctor.
The doctor says, "The test results are back, and I'm sad to say you have cancer and Alzheimer's."
The old man says, "Phew! At least it's not cancer!"
What do you do with epileptic lettuce? -- You make a seizure salad.
