Mom: (Looking through Facebook) How adorable! Kid: (Looking over her shoulder) What a cute ass! The kid's mom blushes until she realizes what he was pointing to. It was a picture of a baby donkey.
The real question is, what was she looking at on the same screen that made her blush at that remark?
What do you call a chicken looking at a bowl of salad?
A chicken sees a salad( chicken Caesar salad )
A father and a son were painting pictures together, the son and father were drawing the exact same thing to a T and the son said "what happened to your hand?" looking at the scar tissue near the father's knuckle, the father replied with "you know what happened, you were there." the son continues to deny this until they both finish their paintings - they're exactly the same.
The father passes out for a few hours and wakes up to find that there's only one painting.
I love going g to Hooters and looking at the menu... If you know what I mean;)
What happens when you see corn looking at you in your window? A corn stalk!!
Him: *slowly drives past elementary school while looking at kids*
Her: Why are you starting at those kids? *jokingly* Are you like a pedophile or something?
Him: ... At least you know why I love calling you 'baby' now~
