Sippin' on promethazine With lean, I fell in love I can't put down the cup I can't put down the cup I can't put down the cup I can't put down the cup I can't put down the cup I can't put down the cup
were gonna have to kill
no good jack and jill
they’re draining the economy doooown!
they’ve spent our budget on weed
and lube to spill jack’s seed
they’ve ruined our wonderful town!
were gonna have to kill
nno good jack and jill
they have no moralityyyy
they’re spreading degeneracy
we aint what we used to be
we’ve got to kill ol no good jack and jill!
jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water
but then they stopped at the tippy top to smoke some marijuana
they went to the store, and got some more, to fetch a “few” more beers
next day they came, ran off again, repeat for 24 years
we’re gonna have to kill
nno good jack and jill!
they’ve banked off buying boooze!
they’ll drink and sell the price
at the original times thrice
corruption wins, the avg. folk’ll loseee.
we’re gonna have to kill
nno good jack and jill
their kids’re in the business tooo!
they’re draining all our banks
give em well deserved spanks
we’ve got to kill ol no good jack and jill
jack and jill netflix and chilled and made a grave mistaaake
what a blunder, there was no rubber, now
they’re a house of eeiiight
a bolt went off, they opened shop
to resell their porn and lean
it all went swell, but for us, well
we’re now an oligarchy!
WE’LL KILL OL JACK AND JILL!
(BILL is sitting in the waiting room, fidgeting with his tie. MR. SMITH enters with a clipboard.)
MR. SMITH: (sternly) Good morning, Bill. Ready for your interview?
BILL: (nervously) Uh, yes, sir! I’ve prepared a lot for this!
MR. SMITH: (raising an eyebrow) Great! Let’s start with an easy question. Why do you want this job?
BILL: (confidently) Well, I want to help your company succeed! I believe in hard work and dedication!
MR. SMITH: (nods) Good to hear. Now, what’s your biggest weakness?
BILL: (eyes widening) I tend to be overly honest.
MR. SMITH: (leaning in) That’s not really a weakness.
BILL: (smirking) I don’t care what you think!
(MR. SMITH pauses, surprised, then bursts out laughing.)
MR. SMITH: (laughing) Okay, you’re hired! We need more honesty around here!
Two priests are driving down a road when they are pulled over by the cops.
The cop shines a light in their faces and signals to the driver to roll down his window.
"We're searching for two child molesters," he says.
The driver leans over to the other priest, and they whisper between themselves.
Finally, he turns back to the policeman. "Ok. We'll do it."
Attended my boss's funeral to pay my respects. On my way out, I leaned over his casket and whispered lightly, "Well, look who's thinking outside the box now."
Your hairline's so ugly it made Michael Jackson lean back.
Why is the Tower of Pisa leaning?
Because unlike the Twin Towers it can dodge.
When you have erectile dysfunction, it could be expressed as the Leaning Tower of Pisa.
Your forehead is so leaned back you can see the dinosaurs.
In my science class we were watching a video, and for no reason at all, it started talking about Black Lives Matter, and my friend leaned over and whispered, “White lives matter more!”
Why was the Tower of Pisa leaning? Because it wanted to look up a 10 year old girl’s skirt.
Why was the Tower of Pisa always leaning?
Cuz it wanted better accuracy than the Twin Towers.
I was struggling on a math test when a girl in a wheelchair leaned over and said, "Hey, this is the easiest thing I've done all day. " I was triggered, so the next day when we were doing the pledge, I leaned over and said, "This is the easiest thing I've done all day."
Lean.
What is the difference between the Twin Towers and the Leaning Tower of Pizza?
One held its balance, the other two fell.
Why was the tower of Pisa leaning?
They had better reflexes than the trading center.
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and the Leaning Tower of Pisa? The Leaning Tower of Pisa has good reflexes
This boy in my high school choir class had a decently big forehead, so I leaned in and said, "You know, if you painted an H on your forehead, maybe Kobe would've landed."
A young peasant coming from the field with his scythe on his shoulder notices an attractive young woman that was doing the laundry in a mountain stream, perched on some rocks near a waterfall.
The guy stops and leans against his scythe, fascinated by the young girl's beauty.
After minutes of watching her, she loses her balance, slips on a rock and falls all the way down, crushing her head on the white rocks.
Thoughtful, he puts his scythe back on his shoulder and walks away, saying to himself "Damn, another washing machine destroyed by limestone!"
"Cummy Beynis. Hahaha?"