Jerry jokes

The Smithsonian has 3 notable articles of clothing on display: Mr. Rodger's sweater, Jerry Seinfeld's puffy shirt, and Stephen Hawking's drool rag.

What is the cherry's favorite cartoon?

"Tom and Jerry!"

What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to the men he took home that said they were hungry? "I've got Ben and Jerry's in the freezer."

Why did Jerry fall off the moon?

Because he got hit by a fridge.

"Hey, man, do you have any Ben and Jerry's?"

"Yeah, I have two of them, fresh and preserved in the freezer."

"I meant the ice cream, bro..."

Jerry Garcia: I’m going on a TRIP today!

Bob Weir: Where are you going?

Jerry Garcia: I’m already on it. 😯🦄🌈

Jerry: My dad got into a fight on a plane.

Jeremy: That's just *plane* crazy!

Jerry: What's the best thing about Switzerland?

Charles: I dunno.

Jerry: Well, the flag is a big plus.

Jack and Jill went up a hill so Jack could eat her candy. But Jack got a shock and a mouth full of cock because Jill’s real name is Randy.

Jack and Jill Went up the hill to have some hanky panky.

Silly Jill forgot her pill. And now there's little Franky.

Little Johnny is watching his mum rubbing cold cream on her face, and he asks her, "Why are you rubbing that stuff on your face, mother?"

His mother replies, "To make myself beautiful, Johnny."

A few minutes later, she starts rubbing the cream off with a tissue. Johnny says to her, "What is the matter? Are you giving up?"

Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a little fun, but stupid Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.

Today, I dreamt about giving head to Johnny Depp.

Then I woke up and realized that I forgot to roll my windows up when passing through the New Jersey Turnpike.