Jehovah's Witnesses

Jehovah's Witnesses jokes

Politician

  • What do you get when you cross a panhandler, a politician, a lobbyist, a prostitute, a sodomite, and a Jehovah's Witness knocking on your door at your house to convert you to their religion?

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    Lesbian

  • What do you get when you cross a lesbian that is a feminazi, a lesbian that is a progressive democrat, a promiscuous woman that is a lesbian prostitute working inside a lesbian brothel in San Francisco, California, and one of Jehovah's Witnesses?

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  • Word

  • Ever wonder how a Jehovah’s Witness spreads their word during Covid?

    Now that you’re here, do you have a moment to talk about our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ?

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    Door

  • I made an advent calendar for a Jehovah’s Witness.

    Behind every door someone tells you to fuck off.

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  • Sex

  • How do the men with bisexual tendencies that are members in the Kingdom Hall of Jehovah's Witnesses have sex with other men without being disfellowshiped in the Jehovah's Witnesses Church?

    Anonymous sex at a glory hole inside the men's restroom at a gay bar.

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    Aclu

  • Why did the ACLU block the cellphone number of a Christian nationalist minister? Because the Christian nationalist had a virus on his cellphone and kept calling the ACLU because he wanted to join the ACLU because he wanted to become a card-carrying member of the ACLU.

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  • Jesus

  • The Sunday school teacher is a little concerned that his kids might be a little confused about Jesus, so he asks his class, “Where is Jesus today?”

    Little Suzy replies, “He’s in heaven.”

    Little Mary replies, “He’s in my heart.”

    Little Johnny says, “He’s in the bathroom!”

    The teacher says, “How do you know this?”

    Then little Johnny says, “Well, every morning my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door, and yells, “Jesus Christ are you still in there!?””

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