My sister is so ugly that she had to have a child with me to keep the family tree going.
Your girlfriend/boyfriend says: "I'm dating your uncle..." You start crying and you look under the bed and your uncle says: "Damn."
If I was any more inbred, I'd be a sandwich.
If you're in Alabama, family reunions are basically speed dating events.
I love climbing over walls because my ancestry was Mexican.
A mother and son were in the backyard, and the son finished building a shed. The mother says, "You're the best husband ever."
I hate prom in Alabama. They always say, "Uhh, actually this is our family reunion." We are in Alabama, so they are the same thing.
Yo, everyone! My sis is pregnant, and I’m gonna be a dad!
Had an amazing night with this girl, woke up, and it was my aunt. Now I’m in love.
I swear I always finish on page 3 when I'm looking at family pictures.
How do you get away with rape and incest in California?
Say you identify as a woman. Fact: It's actually legal to rape your daughter if you are a woman in California.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You slept with my cousin but I did too.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to celebrate their marriage.
Nine months later, they happily had some use for their baby carriage.
Two years later, they went up again, then their daughter had a brother.
But one little secret that no one knew was that Jack and Jill share a mother.
What do you get if you cross diarrhea with incest?
I don't know.
Neither do I, but it runs in the family.
How does an Alabama mother know when her daughter is on her period? She can taste the blood on her son’s penis.
When you meet your gf at the family reunion.
Foreplay in may areas: "You awake?"
Way down South: "You awake, mom?"
Alabama.
Every time there's a family reunion, a baby is born 9 months later.
These days, dating life is hard. You put yourself out there, and it's hard to find someone. The only thing to do is turn to family.
My uncle and I have somewhat of an awkward relationship. At times I find him a bit hard to swallow.
