Hide jokes
What did Osama Bin Laden's kids not inherit after his death?
His hide-and-seek skills.
What do emos and ninjas both have in common? They both hide and cut things.
Figure: Who wants to play hide and seek?
Seek and Hide: Me.
Figure: Okay, hide and I will hide and Seek will be it.
Seek: Why do I have to be it?
Figure: Because your name says so.
Why do we call them dead bodies? Nobody says "alive bodies!" Like you walk into your workplace, "OMFG IT'S FULL OF BODIES! Alive ones, though." You wouldn't give birth and say, "Come on, husband, help me with the bodies." If it's a surprise party, you wouldn't say, "QUICK, HIDE THE BODIES!" And the person who the party was for wouldn't say "OH MY GOD WHY ARE THEY DEAD!"
What’s an orphan's favorite game?
Hide and seek.
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.
I saw this one quote: "The people who smile the most are covering the most pain." I think this is true, just not with everyone. As I am really depressed and act like myself with my friends, but with my parents and family, I force a smile so they don't worry more than they do.
I did a test for my therapy session to see what level of depression I had. It came back with severe, 22/24, but I asked her to tell my mum it came back as moderate, saying I would tell her that my depression got worse. She went along with it, but I haven't told my mum and I now make things sound like I aren't as messed up as I truly am to my therapist.
How do you starve a hippie? You hide its welfare check under the soap.
I tried to organize a professional Hide-and-Seek tournament, but it was a complete failure. Good players are hard to find.
Two women, Jane and Emma, are in the afterlife waiting for judgement.
Emma turns to Jane and says, "I'm just curious, but how did you die?"
Jane replies with, "I burnt to death."
Emma, shocked, responds with, "That sounds horrible! What was it like?"
Jane answers with, "It first felt really hot and painful, but then I felt nothing. How did you die?"
Emma replies with, "Well, I believed my husband was cheating on me. I decided to leave work early one day to make sure he was loyal. I found him on the phone with his mother. I thought he was hiding something from me so I ran to the bedroom and found nothing. Then I sprinted to the kitchen and didn't find anything. I then jolted outside to the backyard and just found that he hadn't cleaned the pool. I was so tired from running that I fell over into the pool and drowned."
Jane retorts with, "Well if you checked the oven neither of us would be here right now."
When the quiet kid gets angry and the sped kid sees your hiding spot.
Bing, bang, boom!
Anne Frank is still the Nazi hide-and-go-seek champion.
Why is the cheetah super good at hide and seek tag? Because he was too fast!
My dad is so good at hiding, even the FBI can't find him.
I worry about him sometimes.
Why is an orphan bad at hide-and-seek?
Because nobody will actually look for them.
Hailey: "Hey Brayden!"
Brayden: "Hey!"
*Music roles around*
*I tell Brayden Hailey likes him*
Brayden: "O_O"
Hailey: *Hides*
So sad </3 xD
I robbed a person in a wheelchair. He cried and said: "You can run, but you can't hide." I ran, and I never saw him again.
What are 8 people hiding in a corner because they're scared?
An octopus.
Why are cheetahs not good at hiding?
They’re always spotted!
Where does Hitler look first when he loses something? The attic.