HA jokes

How do you know Thor has your back?

He's an Asgardian (ass guardian).

Joe Mama has a chode.

Which room has no doors and no windows?

No one has my back like my dad.

Why does the paper follow up with wine because it was junk? Do wrong, so wrong that you don’t even exist because nobody even eats it. Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Haha ha ha! Haha ha haha ha ha! Ha hah hah hah ha!

What does a skeleton say when he has lots of work?

"I have a ton of work, skele-ton."

My brother has a fucking ass and I wake up to him twerking.

Drake has too much meat. Donate to the people in need.

Yo mama so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

What is the difference between me and food?

Food has a use.

What is the difference between a pencil and a woman?

At least one has a point.

A priest asks a nun if she has slept with anyone, and the nun says, "Yes, a fucking hot girl!"

Bob has no arms.

Knock, knock.

"Who's there?"

"It's not Bob."

If someone has a hyperfixation with drawing and playing, does that mean they are on the "artism" spectrum?

Why can't the orphan take a family photo?

Answer: The orphan has no family to take a picture with.

The USA has school shootings. We Canadians have bus beheadings.

What has two wings and an arrow?

A Chinese telephone. "Wing Wing Arrow!"

LEGO Ninjago - I like it, okay?

Which of the ninja would be best for an undercover mission as the person in disguise?

Kai. He just has to leave his hair down and no one would know it was him. He uses hair gel, as Cole has said a couple times I think, because his hair looks like fire 🔥!

I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.

I took out my wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"

"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.

"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" I asked.

"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."

"Will you spend this on hunting equipment?" I asked.

"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't gone hunting in 20 years!"

"Well," I said, "I'm not going to give you money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a shower and a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."

The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that?"

I replied, "Don't worry about that. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up drinking, fishing and hunting."

Okay, I love reading Freshfry's conversations with random people. I love the ones where he has a full blown talking battle. I personally like reading them and I love reading them on my Chromebook while I play Call of Duty and Fortnite on my Xbox.

If you guys out there like reading Freshfry's conversations with random people, just comment and tell me. Talk to you guys later, watersharky out.