HA jokes

I would tell you the pun about the broken pencil, but it has no point to it.

What do you say when your brother has too many jeans?

"Gene-ious!"

What has a dog?

People.

This is an inside joke for my friend Caiden...

"Hey, where’d you get that paint from?" "Ha! Paint!"

My owl turned 180 today.

He isn’t old, he just has a bad neck.

If a gay male is married to a well-endowed, physically challenged gay male that has been sleeping in bed for three hours nonstop, and he wants him to wake up so he can fix him his morning breakfast, how does he wake him up?

Wake up sleeping Jesus by giving him a blowjob.

Drake has too much meat. Donate to the people in need.

Yo mama so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

What is the difference between me and food?

Food has a use.

What is the difference between a pencil and a woman?

At least one has a point.

A priest asks a nun if she has slept with anyone, and the nun says, "Yes, a fucking hot girl!"

Bob has no arms.

Knock, knock.

"Who's there?"

"It's not Bob."

Why can't the orphan take a family photo?

Answer: The orphan has no family to take a picture with.

When a woman is something weeks or months pregnant and her stomach has a visible bump, everyone rubs her tummy, but no one tickles the husband's balls and says, "Good job, buddy!"

What has two wings and an arrow?

A Chinese telephone. "Wing Wing Arrow!"

Have you ever stepped into Steven Hawking's House?

Neither has he.

A house has a crack. A guy covers it with Plaster of Paris.\n\nHouse: "Where the heck am I supposed to do my shit now?"

I think DJT has FTD.

The USA has school shootings. We Canadians have bus beheadings.

Spell "Peppa." Okay. P. E. P. P. A. Hahaha! You said peepee.

I tried this with my sister Makenna because she loves Peppa Pig and has a backpack of it. So I told her to spell her backpack's letters and tricked her... And she is only four years old and my secret is I am only eight years old.