At least he always has a shoulder to cry on.
HA Jokes
A "monster" that has 2 heads, 2 bodies, 6 feet, why am I not afraid of the "monster"? It's my dad riding a horse.
Why does the Tower of Pisa lean?
Because it has better reflexes than the Twin Towers.
Your hairline has a huge path between it, looks like Moses had something to do with it.
My mom loves balls.
But my dad has been gone for the last 4 years.
Texas is such a shitty state. There’s a reason it only has one star.
"Do you have a noose?"
"Nose?"
"Yeah, noose- nose... I heard yours was stuffed lately--haha."
"I actually smell something--like a corpse. Is it you?"
"No."
*Dying on the inside has never been so detectable.*
Did you hear that Rushdie has a new book? It's titled "Buddha, that Fat Fuck."
Why are you sad? Because you are in Morocco, ha ha.
Did you know the Alabama Crimson Tide University has the most handicapped people? You know their motto, "Roll Tide."
What falls first, an apple or an Emo kid?
An apple, because the Emo has a rope holding them.
Little Johnny has no arms. Knock, knock, who's there?
Not Johnny.
So your wife has died, and now she is marginally better in bed than before.
If you really want to get her to wiggle, simply add maggots.
It’s Christmas and Sally has a gift. She got a Barrie. Just kidding, she still hasn’t opened it.
I went to the store because I had to go to school to run up downstairs because my phone started calling me because I was playing Mario Kart on my kitchen sink's baby grandma, like if you cry every time.
Why has nobody been on Neptune? Because the wind is so big. And why the wind's so big? Because Neptune's yelling, "GETT OFFF MMY PPRROOPERRTY!!"
What has to be broken before you can use it?
Answer: An egg.
Being an orphan always has an upside; for instance, a bag of chips is family-sized.
"Guys, let's make this post have the most comments on the whole website!" This post has the most comments on the whole website.
Okay, the time has come... I am finally leaving this website, so yeah.
I'm going to enjoy my life, so yeah.
I'm going to leave now, so bye.
