HA jokes
Did you know the Alabama Crimson Tide University has the most handicapped people? You know their motto, "Roll Tide."
What falls first, an apple or an Emo kid?
An apple, because the Emo has a rope holding them.
Little Johnny has no arms. Knock, knock, who's there?
Not Johnny.
So your wife has died, and now she is marginally better in bed than before.
If you really want to get her to wiggle, simply add maggots.
It’s Christmas and Sally has a gift. She got a Barrie. Just kidding, she still hasn’t opened it.
Memes
I went to the store because I had to go to school to run up downstairs because my phone started calling me because I was playing Mario Kart on my kitchen sink's baby grandma, like if you cry every time.
Why has nobody been on Neptune? Because the wind is so big. And why the wind's so big? Because Neptune's yelling, "GETT OFFF MMY PPRROOPERRTY!!"
What has to be broken before you can use it?
Answer: An egg.
Being an orphan always has an upside; for instance, a bag of chips is family-sized.
"Guys, let's make this post have the most comments on the whole website!" This post has the most comments on the whole website.
Okay, the time has come... I am finally leaving this website, so yeah.
I'm going to enjoy my life, so yeah.
I'm going to leave now, so bye.
What has a tail, a head, but no body?
A coin.
What month of the year has 28 days?
Answer: All of them.
My speech impediment has gotten so worse that I stutter when typing sentences.
What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage, along with a recipe.
Your bitch has Covid-19.
What spooky creature has children?
Mummies.
A man has been dating a girl forever. He finally says, "I love you." The girl says, "Aww, thanks." The man looks at her, "Are you not gonna say it back?" The girl says, "No, I can’t."
Why did the baby cow cross the road?
To find its mom who has the milk.
Person 1: Yassin has sex with a piece of sex.
Person 2: Nice, can I have some of your balls?