HA jokes
Mate, my wife Susan has kicked me out again, anyone got a lift?
Why can’t USA and England play chess?
The USA has no towers, and England doesn’t have a queen.
Bro has to get a fringe to cover up the big, increasing hairline.
You want to get her pregnant before marriage to know if she's fertile, so why not marry a single mother that already has proof?
What is the difference between you and a calendar?
A calendar has dates.
Memes
The way you are so ugly your parents even regret the day you were born.
The way you are so black when your mom is bathing you in the dark, she has to put flour in the water to see you.
🤣🤣🤣
Yo mama's so fat, people think she only has one side!
Zack Stargaze has a small willy, lol.
Why did the orphan stop playing baseball?
Because baseball has a home, and an orphan does not.
Laugh now.
What has nut, long, big, and sticky? A Snickers bar.
My wife is the only person that has "missing" posters attached to her ass.
A guy goes into the gas station and says, "I need a box of rubbers with pesticide."
The cashier said, "Pesticide? Don't you mean spermicide?"
The guy says, "No! My old lady has had a bug up her ass all week, and I am going to kill it."
Your mama is so fat.
She steps on the scales. She has to return in a couple days to get the results.
Q: Why is the Tower of Pisa leaning?
A: Because it has better reflexes than the Twin Towers.
A "monster" that has 2 heads, 2 bodies, 6 feet, why am I not afraid of the "monster"? It's my dad riding a horse.
Why did the orphan get an iPhone 14 for his birthday? Because it has no home button.
Bruh, your forehead is so big even Megamind has some competition!
Your hairline has a huge path between it, looks like Moses had something to do with it.
"Do you have a noose?"
"Nose?"
"Yeah, noose- nose... I heard yours was stuffed lately--haha."
"I actually smell something--like a corpse. Is it you?"
"No."
*Dying on the inside has never been so detectable.*
What is the difference between a baseball player and an orphan?
The baseball player has a home to run back to.