ED Jokes

Revolver

A guy walks into a bar with a revolver and yells, "WHO THE F*** F***ED MY WIFE!" A man in the back responds, "YOU AIN'T GOT ENOUGH BULLETS MATE!"

Victim

Serial murderer Ed Gein was famed for raping, killing, and skinning his victims.

When he was asked why he did it, he responded, "You don't know someone until you walk around in their skin."

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  • Vegetable

    I asked my teacher if I needed to be in the special ED class, but she said I don’t eat enough vegetables.

    Cocaine

    Police: Hey man, look at this! *throws cocaine at fan and it flew back into his face* Me: Are you okay? Police: Looks like I "crack"ed the case.

    Commie

    There once was a commie called Ed. Usually known as Ned. He went to bed, Got shot in the head, Unfortunately now he was dead.

    Portal

    Me walking in to the office:

    Principal: Tell me, what did you do?

    Me: I told the special ed kid that the 4th story window was an end portal...

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  • Orphan

    On Xbox Live, an orphan can say "they f-ed your mom," so you can say, "at least mine didn't die from it."

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  • Chicken

    So there were three baby chickens and two mothers. The first baby said, "Why am I named Calf?"

    And the mother said, "I f***ed a cow."

    Then the second baby came up to its mother, and it said, "Why am I named B***h?"

    And its mom said, "I f***ed a wolf."

    And the final baby came to its mother and said, "Why am I named Orphan?" And because its mother wasn't there to see it, this is what I have to say: "Because you are one, you ducking hitch!!"

    Woman

    An autistic woman walks into a bar. "A serving of Screaming Banshee, please," she says.

    The bartender says, "Ok, you seem to like it, unlike a retired special ed teacher that passed through a few minutes ago."